Little Mockingbird
by Esparzak
Summary: When the unthinkable happens to Sakura, she struggles to fill the gap in her memory from a mission with Kakashi 3 months prior. She stumbles on something tremondous, and finds herself facing a choice that could change the fate of Konoha forever. Kaka/Saku
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This story is somewhat AU-ish because I have not finished all of the manga. For that reason, the Akatsuki is not mentioned at all (sorry fans). It takes place after the time skip and Sakura is twenty years old. Oh, and I don't own Naruto.

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><p><em>What if I fall and hurt myself? Would you know how to fix me? What if I went and lost myself? Would you know where to find me?<em>

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><p>Snow blanketed the streets of Konoha in swirling covers of white and silver. Children danced along the surface, mitten covered hands hooded over their eyes to block out the brilliant white of the sun glinting off everything in sight. Their laughter filled the area with cheer and good will as they hurried along in groups, rolling big snowballs in front of them. A few feet away the structure of a large snowman was in process, a fat, bumpy pile of snow marking his body.<p>

Haruno Sakura sat in the background, perched uneasily on the edge of a snow covered bench. Her pink hair clashed with the bright, everlasting white around her, but the excitement and joy in the atmosphere left her blending into the background, forgotten. She knew she'd give anything to stay in that moment forever, completely and utterly forgotten by the world. Even though she wore no coat, and the cold air stung her bare skin, clawing at the residual warmth inside, she hoped that the snow would swallow her up in one swift movement, leaving no remnants of her departure. She especially hoped no one would be burdened with the news she was given today. Maybe, if she sat there long enough, everything would disappear, like the fleeting fear of a nightmare upon wakening.

_"I'm sorry, Sakura-san…"_

A few minutes passed sluggishly, and nothing happened. She felt like she was stuck on an endless loop, the children around her laughing in the same sequence, patting the same amount of snow onto the same lumpy snowman. It made her feel sick to her stomach all of the sudden and she turned away quickly. Suddenly she noticed the cold moisture seeping into the fabric of her clothes, and she shivered instinctively, but the tremble only reached the outer layers of her skin. Deep inside, her whole body was suspended in time, frozen by the shock and fear for her future.

_"12 weeks…"_

In an instant the endless loop around her was broken as a petite, little girl walked into her line of view, holding a ball of snow decorated with old, mismatched buttons. She smiled weakly at Sakura, and offered the snowball to her. Sakura stared down wordlessly at the ball of snow, recognizing the smiley face constructed by the cluster of buttons. The uneven placement of the eyes and nose should have made Sakura smile. It didn't.

The little girl withdrew the snowball, wounded. She dropped her eyes, her brown hair falling forward, shielding her wide, innocent eyes. Silence descended between the two, and the sounds of life around them seemed muffled in Sakura's ears, as if she was listening from underwater. She was waiting for the small girl to leave, oddly irritated by her presence, when a shy, soft voice spoke to her.

"Why are you crying?" The words thundered loudly in her ears and made her flinch.

Sakura sucked in a breath, and the air felt cold on her teeth. The words brought something alive to her, like nails scratching the surface of an old, oozing wound, and suddenly all she could feel was the roughness of her eyes as the eyelids scraped against the surface with each blink. The dampness on her cheeks felt permanent, as if the frost itself was freezing the tears to her very own skin.

She tried to find her voice somewhere deep inside of her, but all she could muster was a scratchy sigh. The condensation from her breath churned in front of her face and the heat of it stung the skin on her cheeks

The girl looked up, waiting. Sakura stared back, and then, as if a volcano erupted inside suddenly, a fresh new set of tears blurred her vision and spilled over her cheeks.

"I-"

"_Chiyo-chan!"_

The girl startled; the ball of snow slipped from her hands and fell to the ground in a powdery mess. Her line of view quickly switched over her shoulder, and she waved at a middle-aged woman dressed in an expensive wool coat. The woman's eyes peered at Sakura worriedly.

"_Coming, mama!" _

The girl looked back at Sakura, her warm, brown eyes pooling with emotion.

"I hope you feel better, miss. Sometimes when I feel sad I ask my friends to cheer me up." She nodded once, and then turned and ran in the other direction.

Sakura watched her as she went, her tiny feet leaving oval footprints in the snow. The footprints grew smaller and smaller until all she saw was the white line of the horizon.

She gazed down at the ground where the remnants of the young girl's gift remained. There, in the stark white of the snow, laid a pile of buttons. Only this time, the face looked wrong. The eyes were too wide apart, the mouth stretching into a slanting frown.

Sakura tried to think of what the girl said, but all she thought was… _will I even have my friends anymore?_

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><p>Sakura knew something was wrong when she woke up that morning. She awoke warm, and well-rested, feeling better than she had in weeks, only to find her alarm clock had fallen off her dresser, unplugged and useless. Panic struck her as she pulled open her drawer and searched for her watch. <em>Missing. <em>She had worn it for some unforeseen reason last week because she felt like it. Now she tore apart her closet looking for it. When she finally found it, she gasped when the time read _10:25. _ Almost two and half hours late!

She pulled on her boots, and fisted her arms through her coat, not even bothering to check her reflection or brush her teeth. She was out in the streets of Konoha in an instant, rushing among the crowd. She was so hurried she hadn't even noticed the crunch of fresh snow under her boots until a couple in front of her spoke with raised spirits.

"Can you believe it? The children were given the day off. _A snow day they called it._ Little Kimiko-chan was so excited."

Sakura glanced around, suddenly noticing the crowd was larger than usual, with children of all ages skittering along beside their parents speaking animatedly about sleigh rides and snow angels. She pondered momentarily about her own childhood and she had almost forgotten how late she was when a familiar voice called out to her.

_"Sakura!"_

She turned to see Ino standing a few feet ahead, looking posh and glamorous in a skin tight snow suit crowned with fur on the edges. Her face with stricken with surprise.

Sakura caught up to her in a few hurried strides. "Ino, something wrong?"

Ino eyed the pair of pajamas hidden beneath Sakura's down coat, a look of pure distaste on her face. "Well, actually, more than I thought."

Sakura narrowed her eyes at the blond. "Oh, shut-up, Ino-pig. Not everyone looks as glamorous as you straight out of bed."

Ino disregarded the comment, falling into step beside the pink-haired girl. She eyed Sakura's appearance, noting the sunken shape of her cheeks and the disarray of her unkempt hair. "What's with you lately..?"

"What do you mean?"

Ino stopped suddenly, pulling Sakura to face her. She grabbed a fist-full of her pink hair and displayed it in front of Sakura. "Split-ends? Knots? The Sakura I knew would never let her hair be un-cared for!" She dropped her hair suddenly, motioning to the pair of baggy sweats that swallowed up the petite girl in front of her. "And what's with the pajamas? Really, Sakura? Something's going on. Spill!"

Fury flashed in Sakura's face, reddening her cheeks. "Leave me alone, _Ino! _Ive been busy at work and you know it!"

"No, _Sakura… _I'm no fool. Something's happened to you! Is it a boy? Did he finally pluck your cherry?"

Sakura could feel the heat rising in her veins. She was losing it, _fast_. She stepped forward, ready to quell the anger with her blond friend, until a sight of a clock in her peripheral vision stopped her.

She turned quickly, shouting over her shoulder, "_Mind your own business,_ _pig!"_ And she was off again, pushing through the crowd toward the Hokage tower.

In the distance she could faintly hear Ino's voice over the crowd. _"You better hurry, Forehead! She's in a terrible mood today!"_

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><p>Ino's statement was way off target. Sakura had seen the Hokage in a terrible mood many times. Things were usually smashed and sake was almost always demanded for. But this was worse… <em>way worse. <em>She'd take a terrible mood over this any day.

If it could be described thoroughly in words, you could say Sakura walked in on a massacre that day. But it looked worse than that. It really did.

It was hard to recognize Tsunade's office. The desk was overturned, two of four legs were snapped off, lying in a pile of wood in the corner. Next to it, both bookshelves were overturned, the books spilling over the floor in a disorderly manner. The wheels of the upturned office chair spun madly in the air.

Sakura moved swiftly and quietly, hoping to disappear against the floral wallpaper. She pressed her back against the wall, and watched the madness unfold. She'd be a fool if she said she wasn't scared.

Tsunade held a jounin shinobi by his green flak vest, shaking him violently in the air. _"He got away?"_

She tossed him easily to the side, and he collided against the window. The window cracked and splintered under the pressure. The petite, yet frightening woman turned to the group of jounin huddled in the corner. They flinched as she moved towards them.

Sakura suddenly noticed who made up the group. Neiji, Genma, Tenzou, and Kakashi gathered closely, awaiting the wrath of the Hokage. The man lying in a heap on the floor was Shikamaru. He looked wounded and annoyed as he glared back at the Hokage. Sakura's attention paused on Kakashi. She hadn't seen him since their last mission together almost 3 months ago. His forehead protector was missing, revealing a sagging, bloody sharingan eye. She gritted her teeth, mentally scolding her former sensei. _He'd overdone it yet again…_

His eyes met hers across the room briefly, before he turned his attention back to the fuming woman. "Tsunade-sama, _you must understand._ We were outnumbered and he had the element of surprise against us. No one expected to see him this close to Fire country. His intentions seemed… _odd._"

Tsunade's perfectly manicured hand reached out and grasped Kakashi's vest firmly. Kakashi didn't even flinch; he merely peered back at her tiredly. "_There are no excuses! Uchiha Sasuke is a threat to the village! He should be treated as such!"_

The sound of his name made Sakura's breath catch in her throat. She clamped her hand to her mouth, fighting the urge to cry out. Her heart raced frantically at the thought of Sasuke, so close to the village. She hadn't heard his name in almost a year, and she was doing an excellent job trying to move on with her life. But he was like a scar in her heart; the mere thought of him peeled open the scab, leaving her bleeding all over again.

An emotion flashed quickly in Kakashi's eyes. "What? Do you think I was easy on him? Do you think I can't kill my former student?"

The acidity in his voice caught Tsunade off guard, and she faltered momentarily, releasing the hold on his vest. The fabric remained wrinkled and folded together.

_"Don't you start with me, Kakashi! This isn't about you!"_

Tenzou stepped forward, pushing his comrade behind him. "Tsunade-sama, we ran him all the way north towards Rice Country. We're sure he's headed to Hidden Sound. He had a group of 5-6 sound shinobi with him, including a medic."

Genma spoke this time. "But what the hell was he doing here with so few in his aid? Surely he wasn't here to attack. It's not like him to run."

"It sounds like research to me." Tenzou supplied.

Tsunade finally sighed, letting her anger slip away momentarily. Suddenly, she seemed very tired and old. "He _will_ eventually take revenge on this village. It's in his blood. We need to kill him before things escalate."

Shikamaru stood, brushing the dust from his pants. "Hokage-sama, we can't counteract without a decent plan. We need time to figure out the correct strategy."

The anger welled inside Tsunade again, and she trembled impulsively. "Two weeks," She spat between gritted teeth, "I'm giving you two weeks to come up with a decent plan. _DON'T YOU DARE LET ME DOWN!"_

The windows rattled against her bellowing voice, and Sakura yelped. It was the worst thing she had done all day, slipping up like that. In an instant, all pairs of eyes were on her, including the darkened ones of her angered sensei. She swore she heard Shikamaru chuckle before…

_"YOU!" _

Sakura's ear drums throbbed and the window cracked and spidered towards its frame.

_"HOW DARE YOU COME IN TWO AND HALF HOURS LATE? AND LOOKING LIKE THAT TO TOP IT OFF!"_

Sakura squeezed her eyes shut and cradled her face in her hands, mentally scolding herself for not taking an extra two minutes to properly dress herself. Now she would have to face the residual wrath of her sensei, thanks to the dreaded news about Sasuke.

Tsunade turned towards the jounin group staring wide-eyed at a blushing Sakura. "You all are dismissed! _Get to work immediately!"_

The men nodded in unison, not daring to glance at Sakura as they shuffled out of the room. Except Kakashi… he paused in the doorway, scanned Sakura with one quick glance, and sent her a look of concern. Sakura didn't return his concern, just stared, red-faced, like a deer in headlights. Tsunade slammed the door behind the silver-haired man, and this time, the window shattered completely, shards of glass decorating the floor and the ground beneath it.

Tsunade turned swiftly, and Sakura flinched, awaiting her punishment, but only silence descended. The sound of faraway laughter on the streets echoed quietly in the ravaged room. The open window left a frigid draft seeping in, and Sakura shivered, but it wasn't due to the cold.

And then, "What's wrong with you lately?"

_There it was. That damn question again._

Sakura peered up at her teacher with sad eyes, unable to answer the question. _What was wrong with her? _She seemed more tired than usual, and eating had become difficult, but wasn't that just a symptom of stress?

"Shishou… I-I…"

Tsunade sighed and ran her fingers through her sleek, straight hair. "What happened to my student with all the fire in her spirit? You really had something going for you… but now, you're just another girl who putters around my office."

The words stung and clamped around her already bleeding heart. Before she knew it, fresh tears pooled in her eyes, blurring her vision of her disappointed superior.

"I'm so sorry, shishou… I really haven't been feeling well. I think I need to get a check-up. Something hasn't been right." She sighed, "I know it's no excuse. _Please, _give me a chance. I'll go get checked right away."

Tsunade sighed again, anger lacing her voice again. "Go… I'm giving you the day off. But Sakura…" She narrowed her eyes at the pink-haired girl, "I won't put up with this tired attitude much longer."

Sakura nodded once, and quickly dashed out of the room. Her mind reeled with the news of Sasuke, and she was sure her day couldn't get any worse…

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><p>"Sakura-san?"<p>

Hinata's quiet, feminine voice spoke across the packed waiting room. If Sakura hadn't known Hinata personally, she wouldn't have recognized her voice through the loud, bustling waiting room. With winter came the flu season, and the many people hacking and sniffling next to Sakura showed it was here in full force. She stood quickly, grabbing a shot of hand sanitizer before dashing off towards the dark-haired girl.

She nodded, smiling genuinely at her friend. "Hinata… I'm so glad to see you. I didn't know you were working at the clinic today."

Hinata returned her smile meekly. "Oh, I don't mind helping out when they're short-handed…" She motioned through the open door, pointing at a door at the end of the hall. "Room 7, please, Sakura-san."

Sakura smiled at the number perched above the doorway. _Number 7… just like my old team. _Suddenly she felt it was a good sign that everything would be ok. She marched in the room confidently, removing her coat and looping it on the coat rack. Hinata followed her in shyly, handing her a paper gown.

Hinata blushed furiously. "I'm sorry Sakura-san, it's protocol."

Sakura took the gown, smiling brightly at her dark-haired friend. She knew how things in healthcare worked. Leave it to Hinata to find changing into a gown embarrassing… she appreciated her friend's honesty, though.

"I understand, Hinata. Trust me." She chuckled.

Hinata nodded, and turned to leave, the door clicking shut behind her. Sakura dressed quickly, removing everything but her underwear. She folded her clothes in a neat pile, and began to ponder about her condition, lining all the symptoms up together in her head. The extreme fatigue and nausea were her main warning signs, although it seemed the nausea was getting better. She figured she had a touch of something that she couldn't seem to get rid of. It was flu season after all.

She twiddled her thumbs impatiently, trying to quell the anxiety in her. _It was nothing… it had to be the stress…_ She'd seen what the life of a shinobi could do to people. Once, a few years back, Chouji had been so stressed about the chuunin exam that all he ate was oranges… for two weeks straight. Besides losing an insane amount of weight, he was fine. He went on to continue eating normally and he was unchanged by the whole experience. Sakura knew it had to be something like that. Her training with Tsunade and her job at the hospital could be very stressful to juggle at times.

Sakura sighed, watching the clock on the wall tick. It seemed like an eternity before Hinata returned.

A soft knock on the door prompted Sakura to answer _"Come in."_ The door clicked open, and Hinata entered backwards, allowing Sakura extra time to cover herself. The gesture made Sakura smile. Hinata was always so considerate of everyone's privacy, an attribute that was hard to come by in the world of shinobi.

Hinata hid her face behind the clipboard in her hand. "Ok, Sakura-san, what kind of symptoms have you had lately?"

Sakura paused, suddenly realizing how nervous she was. She shifted on the exam table, and the paper gown crinkled loudly. "Well, I've been very tired… and very, very nauseous. Sometimes I vomit several times a day with no warning. It seems all I can eat is…" Sakura paused, and blushed, knowing how ridiculous what she was about to say was. "…ramen."

Hinata's whole face flashed bright red, and Sakura immediately knew her words reminded Hinata of her blond teammate. She took it as an opportunity to steer the conversation away from herself.

"How is Naruto, Hinata? I know you too have been spending some time together."

This obviously was the right move, because Hinata's voice squeaked as the clipboard fell to the floor clamorously. Hinata stooped quickly and retrieved the clipboard, shuffling papers in her hand nervously.

"I-I'm just going to run a f-few standard tests. Sakura-san…" Hinata's voice continued to ramble on about blood pressure, blood tests, and urine tests. Sakura was relieved the diversion was a success. She didn't particularly like playing patient and she was ready to get on with her life and get her focus back. No more tired, lifeless Sakura.

Hinata worked quickly, drawing blood, checking blood pressure, taking Sakura's height and weight. Sakura frowned when she noticed she had gained 3 kilos. It seemed impossible to her. She barely ate, and what she did eat, she usually ended up vomiting.

"I'm sure it's just a flu bug, Sakura-san. But I will run your blood tests just to be sure." Hinata blushed furiously suddenly, her voice lowering. "D-do you know when your last menstruation was?"

Sakura's eyes widened. _Of course she'd ask that question… _She thought very hard, and each passing second made Hinata more and more flustered. She couldn't remember having a period since a little bit before the mission she had with Kakashi, around three months ago. It was an occurrence that should probably have any normal woman worried, but Sakura was a kunoichi. The life of a kunoichi was stressful, and it wasn't an odd occurrence to skip a few periods.

Sakura hesitated before she spoke. She attempted to strengthen her demeanor. "September sometime," Sakura's voice was weak and shaky. "B-but that's normal for me. I'm never regular."

Hinata nodded quickly, attempting to hide her emotion. "O-of course, Sakura-san…"

The dark-haired girl dashed out of the room, and Sakura took her time dressing into her clothes. Her mind wandered back to the conversation in the Hokage's office. Were they really going to assassinate Sasuke? Was he really a threat to Konoha? And most of all, how would she feel about it if he was killed?

Sakura sighed, unable to think about it anymore. She _should _hate Sasuke with every fiber of her being; he was a cold, calculated murdered now, a pawn in Orochimaru's sick twisted game. But all she could see was young, lost school boy, crying alone among the corpses of his own family. Sasuke had become a part of their family, _her family_, in Team 7. She knew Naruto felt the same way. But what about Kakashi? His dark, bitter words surprised her today. _Do you think I can't kill my former student?_

Something about Kakashi had always left her feeling confused, longing to know more. His past was dark and cold, as Sasuke's was. Why was it that he could handle the loneliness and Sasuke couldn't? Maybe the truth was that he really couldn't. She'd seen him too many times standing at the memorial in the graveyard, just staring. Hours would pass and he wouldn't move. Was that why Kakashi was so mysterious? So difficult to get close to? She supposed she had no reason to get close to him anymore. His job as her sensei was over; Tsunade was now her subordinate. And the way things were, it seemed it would stay that way. She rarely saw her former sensei, and in passing he would only mutter a simple "yo" before slipping away into the crowd again. In fact, she was surprised to be teamed up with him on a mission a few months back. The mission itself brought back fond memories she wished she could relive. If only things had been different… if Sasuke hadn't made an alliance with Orochimaru. But she knew life had its own path. It was up to her to follow it as best as she could. She supposed she was doing an okay job…

The sound of the door clicking open startled Sakura from her thoughts. She glanced momentarily at the clock, realizing twenty minutes had already passed since Hinata's departure. She turned towards her dark-haired friend, ready to give her a convincing smile, when Hinata's expression stopped her.

Sakura froze. Hinata stared hard at the ground, her lips trembling. The color on her face was completely drained, and the flesh looked gray and pallor. Something in Hinata's eyes startled Sakura, and she shivered in response. Fear gripped at her throat, clawing and scratching into her chest.

Sakura leapt forward, and grasped Hinata by the shoulders roughly. She shook her once, twice, and searched the other girl's face for an answer… for hope. "What is it, Hinata? What's wrong?"

Hinata yelped and squeezed her eyes shut, trembling against Sakura's jarring grasp. She pressed the clipboard tightly against her chest, gripping the edges of the paper until her knuckles turned white.

Sakura held tightly to the dark-haired girl, her nails digging into the flesh beneath them. She tried to calm her voice, but it came out harsh and harried. "Hinata! Tell me!"

Hinata finally cried out, flashing her worried eyes at the pink-haired girl. She pushed the clipboard into Sakura's chest, ready to lift the burden from her hands. Sakura stumbled, the clipboard fumbling in her hands. The sound of blood pulsing in her ears was deafening as she searched the paper before her. All she saw was point 10 font reading numbers and letters that were all too familiar—the sign of a normal, healthy woman. She almost sighed in relief, until she saw it… there were way too many numbers there.

_HCG quantitative: 227, 000_

All of sudden the room felt very unsteady, and Sakura stumbled backwards. Panic stole away her soft features as she stared back at Hinata, her jaw trembling with each shallow breath.

_Pregnant… she was pregnant._

The clipboard clattered on the floor, and the startling sound pierced through Sakura's frozen demeanor. She fell to her knees suddenly, her hands splayed out on the floor in front of her. She stared hard at a black speck of ink on the tiled floor, concentrating on each breath. _Inhale… exhale… inhale…_

Each passing breath came out shorter, harder than the last until Sakura was near hyperventilation.

Hinata's soft, tender voice shattered the silence. "I'm sorry, Sakura-san…"

Sakura was on her feet in an instant, grasping the dark-haired shoulders again. She squeezed tight, felt the muscle spring beneath her fingers. "Are you sure? W-what if you ran the wrong blood through? What if it wasn't mine?"

Hinata squeaked in pain, frightened by the sudden manic in Sakura's voice. "S-Sakura-san… I-I'm sorry… I'm so sorry…"

Sakura released the trembling girl suddenly. "No! It's not possible! You don't understand!" Hot tears sprung from her emerald eyes. "It's not possible!"

Hinata helped the hysterical pink-haired girl into the chair, squeezing her hand with reassurance. "I think you're almost 12 weeks…"

Hinata tried with every ounce of courage to be an anchor for the trembling girl. But it was hard to see it. Haruno Sakura… _strong, confident Sakura… _diminished to a quivering pile of tears. For a moment, she thought of her former teacher, Kurenei and the small toddler she had now. Her life as a strong, independent kunoichi was over. She sighed, trying to think of Sakura that way. The image didn't fit.

Sakura's sobs stopped suddenly, and for a moment, the two girls remained suspended in time, clinging to each other for different reasons. Silence swallowed them up, stitching the bond between them.

Sakura pulled away, and the bond was broken. Now they were just two girls sitting in the same room, trying hard but failing not to judge each other.

"Hinata…" Sakura's voice was deeper, making her seem older and more tired than her twenty years. "Hinata, you mustn't tell anyone. _Please."_

Hinata nodded, and Sakura stood slowly, shakily. She turned and sprinted out of the room, passing the waiting room full of sick people, the street outside the clinic, and finally the marketplace where she talked with Ino earlier that morning. Her legs kept moving instinctively as her chest squeezed tighter and tighter until breathing was impossible.

She tried hard, struggling with an inner turmoil to believe Hinata would keep her promise. But today, nothing seemed as it should.

* * *

><p>As night began to descend on the streets of Konoha, children of all ages retreated in clusters, their cheeks rosy and their mittens sodden with melted snow. In the clearing they left behind a very, robust and jolly snowman. His crooked carrot nose and toothy, button grin was the perfect personification of a day well spent in the snow.<p>

Sakura watched the sun setting in the horizon, its bright orange hue casting a dreamy, tangerine tint on the melted snow. She wished she was in a different state of mind so that she could appreciate the beauty and magic of her surroundings. But something about it seemed askew to her, like watching rain fall on a sunny day. She wondered what it all would mean to her next year. Would she be a parent, just like the others, looking on as her child played in the snow? Would this be her last winter as a kunoichi, with nothing on her mind but medicine and jutsus?

No… _it wasn't possible. It couldn't be possible._ Somehow, everything in her world had lurched and rapidly changed direction, and now she was left muddled and dizzy. Everything that had once been solid and tangible was now just an illusion. And the worst part of all was it wasn't just one life she had to figure out, it was two-two pulsing, beating hearts intertwined into one body.

That thought had the bile rising in her throat again. She heaved forward, wrapping her arms around body. Counting to ten, she squeezed the flesh of her upper arms to quell the sickening see-saw in her stomach. Her fingers were numb and felt like cold stones against her skin.

The shock of the day could no longer keep her numb to the surroundings. She knew she had to get out of the cold. Sitting there pondering away in freezing temperatures wasn't going to help her situation at all.

And then, just as she readied herself to leave, she felt it—that warm, familiar burst of chakra. She knew it was him even before he came into view. His chakra was almost as familiar to her as her own; years of camaraderie gave her plenty of time to memorize it.

"Kakashi-sensei…"

He appeared suddenly beside her, his shoulder brushing against hers. The warmth of his body was blazing against her frigid skin, and she sighed, longing for more of it. She settled by leaning a little into him, and the heat swallowed her in an entrancing bubble. She almost forgot he was there, until he spoke, his voice deep and liquid in her ears.

"Sakura… what are you doing out here?"

His words shattered her momentary paradise, and the reality of the day came crashing down upon her abruptly. She withdrew herself from his warmth, and put her face in her hands, rubbing the flesh until it was raw.

"I-I…" She stammered, searching deep inside for the right words.

He peered down at her with knowing eyes, and then removed his green flak vest, wrapping it around her shoulders. The utter, blissful warmth seeped into the frozen, outer layers of her skin, and she gasped, struggling to keep her legs from buckling beneath her. In that moment, it was all she needed, and even the problem that lay beneath the taut muscles of her stomach seemed distant and trivial.

"Come on… let's get you home."

Kakashi turned, starting towards the street ahead, but Sakura remained frozen, staring back at him with widened, blood-shot eyes. She watched the back of his profile, studying the curve of his back and the disarray of silver hair, and suddenly a thought struck her, knocking the breath right out of her lungs in one, swift rush of air.

"Tell me…"

He turned, regarding her with one stoic eye. He shrugged, motioning for her to continue.

"What happened…?" She grasped the edge of his vest and tightened it around her. "That mission we had three months ago…"

Kakashi flinched, a look of surprise flashing in his face briefly. He quickly corrected his posture, though, hardening his features until only indifference remained. "What do you mean?"

"Did anything… happen to me?"

One silver brow rose as she spoke. "Injuries, you mean?"

She bit her lip, peering at him with nervous eyes. "No, nothing like that…"

Kakashi shuffled his weight onto the opposite food, crossing his arms. "I'm not sure what you're talking about Sakura."

She suddenly regretted asking, knowing the silver-haired man was not one to talk about such things with. But she pressed on, desperate for answers.

"Well, I mean, could anything have happened that would make me forget… certain things?"

Kakashi's visible eye widened, and he startled, lowering his arms by his side. Confusion swept over his features, and in the basking glow of the setting sun he seemed tired and old. In one quick, fleeting moment, understanding shone in his eye.

He narrowed his eyes. "What are you implying, Sakura?"

Heat flooded her face, and she suddenly realized the hole she had dug herself. "N-nothing… nevermind."

Kakashi stared at her through one narrowed eye, casting an aura of keen perception. The awareness in his lone, coal colored eye made Sakura shiver, and she turned away from him, desperate to break the suffocating atmosphere between them.

She waved her hand casually. "Sorry, forget it. I've just had a bad day that's all."

She turned to leave, brushing past him hurriedly, but his gloved hand reached out and grasped her wrist. She gasped, peering down at his big, warm hand in shock. With the flick of his arm, he twirled her towards him, pulling her closer in one, swift movement. The height difference was substantially obvious as he glared down at her with warning in his eye.

Sakura gulped, and then attempted assurance in her voice. "W-what-"

"Don't tell anyone about what you heard today." His voice was dark and masculine, and the words rattled Sakura's demeanor all the way to the bone. She froze, her heart racing erratically as silence surrounded them. She was aghast; completely and utter shocked. _Did he know already?_

He squeezed her wrist tighter. "Did you hear me?"

"Y-yes."

He released her, the warmth of his hand retreating, but he made no move to increase the distance between them. Sakura sucked in her breath and held it tight, knowing it was the only thing keeping her adhered to the earth.

"Especially Naruto."

Confusion struck her features and she took a step back. "What?"

"Don't tell Naruto about Sasuke. He won't be able to take it well, and we need to keep him out of this situation."

Understanding rushed inside of her so fast she felt the earth beneath her feet shudder. Something oddly similar to relief crossed her mind, but it was quickly replaced with disappointment. Somewhere deep in the back of her mind, she was hoping Kakashi would have an answer for her, _anything _to make sense of her situation. Now she just felt spent and completely hopeless.

"R-right. Of course."

He nodded at her once, and his eye crinkled slightly in a meaningful smile. "Now, come on. We need to get you home."

Sakura paused, not wanting the moment to end. She peered up at him with desperation, and then, reluctantly, she nodded in agreement. Kakashi turned, starting towards the street ahead. Sakura trudged behind him hesitantly, gripping his flak jacket and pulling it tightly against her. The streets were getting darker, and as they made their way closer, the streetlamps flicked on, casting an eerie yellow glow. She glanced back once at the snowman standing alone in the clearing, and in the dim, foggy light his button eyes squinted at her uncannily.

_Today, she knew, was the mark of both a beginning and an end; both she was wholly unprepared to face._

* * *

><p>AN: Please review! This chapter was a little difficult for me because not much happened. It was almost a "filler"; a fluff chapter that introduces something much greater. I promise the storyline will get better. Thanks for taking a look!


	2. Chapter 2

_Your heavy heart is made of stone_

_And it's so hard to see you clearly_

_You don't have to be alone_

* * *

><p>Sakura lay lifeless in her bed, a mountain of blankets huddled on top of her. A pile of wadded up Kleenexes sat beside her bed, piling onto the floor haphazardly. She was sure she was a sight for sore eyes lying there with a thermometer sticking out from her lower lip. Letting out yet another rattling sneeze, she leaned forward and plucked the thermometer from her mouth.<p>

_101.4 degrees…_

It seemed her brooding escapade out in the cold yesterday wasn't quite the best idea. She sighed angrily and plopped back in bed, bunching the blanket around her face.

Lucky for Sakura, it was her day off from the hospital. She definitely didn't feel like facing Tsunade looking and feeling worse than she had before. Now she had the day to spend lamenting away in her germ infested bed… wonderful. When she awoke that morning she almost reached for the cold medicine in her cabinet until a thought crossed her mind, reminding her she wasn't free to live her life carelessly anymore.

And with that thought she was also reminded that there were much more important things to face than a mere head cold.

She wasn't even sure how to go about facing it. Somehow, in some miraculous, life-destroying scheme, there was a little fetus growing inside of her, sucking away all her nutrients and only getting bigger by the day. It was unfathomable, especially because she had no recollection of any sexual activity in her memory. Wasn't that how babies were made? Wasn't it the consequence of two adult individuals enjoying each other's company? Well, somehow Sakura got the dreaded consequence without ever enjoying anyone's company.

The fact that it existed inside of her wasn't actually what made her head spin; it was the thought that somehow, some way, someone had undressed her and _violated her_ without her ever knowing. Just the thought had her skin crawling and her stomach churning. Who was it? Was it someone she knew? When did it happen? Did she actually _enjoy it? _

She never lingered long on that thought. If she did, she knew the world around her would begin to spin and she would get that sickening surge of bile in her throat again.

Sakura sighed, fighting the familiar rush of panic in her mind. She rolled over in bed, pulling the blanket over her head and trying hard to steer her mind back to brainstorm mode. _She had to think… There had to be some clues in there…_

Her last period was over 12 weeks ago, which would line up with the amount of HCG in the blood test. But what could have happened after that that left a huge gaping hole in her memory? Sometimes people selectively choose what to remember, but there was no way she could forget _that…_ Especially _that._

Every time she tried to recount her days following she always came back to the same thing—the mission with Kakashi.

Something was there. She knew it. It landed perfectly in her ovulation window. But it was a simple, routine A-class mission. They were to carry a package across Fire Country to a small village called Hanaka, and deliver it to a very wealthy business man there. The mission went smoothly and they only encountered two battles, in which the opposing shinobi were grossly outmatched. The mission lasted ten days, and out of those, only two were spent in villages where civilization existed. The rest were spent camping beneath the stars next to a loudly snoring Kakashi. She knew it couldn't be him… there was no way. But maybe he could shed some light on time they spent apart? Had she wandered off and got mad drunk somewhere where a worthless blockhead took advantage of her? It didn't particularly sound like something she would do, but technically, she was proven that anything could happen.

She replayed the mission over and over in her mind like a broken record, and nothing even remotely suspicious came to mind. Thinking about it any longer was only making her head hurt more, and she knew she had to take action somehow to find the answers she needed.

Sakura growled through gritted teeth, letting her eyes travel to her closet where Kakashi's green, flak vest hung conspicuously between her plain kimonos. She supposed it was an excuse to talk to him again if she played her cards right. She had to find him where he least expected her to show up, and where he couldn't slip away with another bogus excuse…

Sakura was _almost _confident where to start…

* * *

><p><em><strong>BANG! BANG! BANG!<strong>_

Sakura yelped and lunged forward, crashing to the floor in a heap of disheveled blankets. In an instant, her blissful slumber had been shattered, and she was sent harshly back to reality. She shot a muffled curse at the floor beneath her as she gathered herself to stand.

_**BANG! BANG! BANG!**_

Suddenly realizing where the offending sound was coming from, she glared daggers at the wood paneling of her front door, hoping her hate and disdain would somehow make it through to the other side.

"_**ALRIGHT! **_I'm coming!" Sakura yelled, gathering the blanket around her shoulders. She stood reluctantly, making her way towards the door. She cursed one last time before pulling the door open gruffly, too angry to care that her eyes were blood-shot and her face was crusted with drool.

"Yes?"

Naruto stood proudly at her front door, staring back at her with his trademark smile. He grinned wider, ready to regard his female friend with a bear hug, until he caught sight of her pitiful outward appearance. He faltered as his jaw fell open.

"_Sakura-chan!_ What happened?"

"I'm sick." She dead-panned, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

She sent Naruto an annoyed look and then turned, leaving her front door wide open. She'd known Naruto too many years to know that something as simple as a door wouldn't him out. Making her way into the kitchen, Sakura flicked on the tea kettle and removed two mugs from the cabinet. Naruto was already there, though, sitting comfortably at the kitchen table and munching on her day-old donuts.

"What are you doing here, Naruto?" She tried to lace her voice with kindness, but it was hard to do in her sleep-deprived state.

Naruto grinned widely, displaying a mouthful of chewed donuts. "I jus- wanit- to know ho- you were."

Sakura stared at her friend blankly. "Rrright." She turned, searching the cabinet for her left over tea bags. "Or is there something you want me to do for you?"

Her voice was muffled through the wooden encasement of the cabinet, and for a moment she thought he hadn't heard her. Shutting the cabinet door loudly, Sakura turned, ready to repeat herself until she caught sight of the serious frown on Naruto's face.

Fear struck her instantly, reminding her of the burning secret hidden beneath her clothing. Her hand fell instinctively to the tiny, swollen bump beneath her pajamas.

She opened her mouth to speak, but the sound of a chair scraping on the floor interrupted her. Naruto made his way around the table in one, swift movement, closing the gap between them. His brilliant, cerulean eyes stared down at her with concern.

"Hinata-chan told me to come see you; that you needed my support."

Sakura gulped, feeling the heat of fresh tears gather beneath her eyes. _She wasn't ready for this yet…_ _She thought Hinata would at least give her a little time to figure it all out._

"Naruto…"

Naruto wrapped his arm around Sakura, pulling her into a crushing embrace. Sakura coughed and struggled against the lack of oxygen in her chest. She was keenly aware of the little growing life squeezed between them.

"What's going on Sakura-chan? You can tell me anything…"

Confusion struck her features and she pulled away from him. She peered up at him, searching his face for any disappointment. When she found none, she sighed in relief and let her eyes wander away from his.

"_She didn't tell you…" _She muttered softly under her breath.

Naruto stared at her with puzzlement creased into his brow. "What...?"

Sakura shook her head, rubbing a hand over her forehead. "Nothing, never mind…"

The shrill sound of the tea kettle interrupted the heated conversation between them, and Sakura quickly took it as an opportunity to divert Naruto's attention. She moved hurriedly, pouring the hot water into the mugs and steeping the tea bags one by one. She added an extra spoonful of sugar to Naruto's mug before settling down at the table, ready to change the direction of the conversation.

Naruto didn't take the hint. "Sakura-chan, _what's going on? _Did something happen to you?"

He moved closer until he was towering over her seated position at the table. Sakura sighed heavily, gripping the warm mug tightly. She was too tired to handle a suspicious Naruto today…

"No, Naruto. Nothing's happened. _I'm fine._"

Naruto sat down suddenly, gathering Sakura's hands in his. "Sakura-chan, _please, _I want to help."

Sakura stared down at Naruto's warm hands encircled over hers. Years of close friendship hadn't changed his feelings for her. Even though he spent more and more time with Hinata by his side, there were moments like this where his feelings would erupt again, making Sakura feel guilty and sad. She loved Naruto… _she really did._ But it would never be what they both needed.

The gentleness in Naruto's words struck Sakura hard, and she felt herself slowly giving in. "Naruto…" She removed her hands quietly, and folded them in her lap. "I just haven't been feeling well. Yesterday, Tsunade told me she was disappointed in me, and it really hit me hard. I didn't know how to handle it…"

Naruto's eyes shone with empathy. "I'm sorry Sakura-chan…"

She nodded once and turned away from him, raising the warm mug of tea to her lips. Her words weren't exactly a lie; they were entirely true. But she was merely using it as a diversion from the problem that was much more substantial. She idly wondered when she would tell Naruto, and _how._ It would be something she would have to tackle when she had more knowledge of the situation. But would she ever have the courage to face him—face all her friends? Maybe it would be something she didn't have to face if she made a certain decision…

That thought made her heart drop instantly. _She couldn't do that…_ She spent every day fighting through blood, sweat, and tears to _save_ lives. How could she take one away from a child that had no say in the situation? It was definitely a contradiction for her…

Sadness swelled in Sakura like a wave crashing onto shore, and she desperately fought the tears building inside of her. A familiar burning, tightness surged in her throat and she gulped, hoping to quell the storm inside of her before it erupted. She squeezed her eyes shut and searched her mind for something, _anything,_ to distract her.

Luckily Naruto was already a step ahead of her. "Hey, Sakura-chan, are you coming to the Konoha Winter Celebration next week?"

Sakura blinked, entirely caught off guard by Naruto's question. With all the news she had faced lately, she had completely forgotten about it. It was an annual occurrence that attempted to bring holiday cheer and joy to the shinobi population; however, it usually just ended up being a night full of mindless drinking and degrading hook-ups. Sakura really enjoyed the tree lighting ceremony, though.

"Well…" She thought about it for a moment, realizing how hard it would be to dodge the never-ending offers for alcohol. She wasn't sure she had the strength to put up with that.

Excitement brimmed in Naruto's eyes, and he shot Sakura a near perfect puppy dog face. "Aww, _please?"_

Sakura melted, mentally scolding herself for giving in so easily. "Oh, alright. But I'm not staying long."

Naruto shot up, raising his fist in the air. "Alright!"

Sakura glared at his antics and crossed her arms over her chest angrily. The endless bounds of happiness in Naruto were far from charming, but she also knew it was something to admire. He was always there ready to pick her up after she'd fallen. She wasn't sure she could find that quality in any of her other friends. Kakashi had a similar support system for her, but it wasn't nearly as extensive as Naruto's. She could always count on her blonde friend. _Period._

Her hand brushed across her stomach momentarily. But was that something she was getting ready to challenge? She hoped not…

* * *

><p>The nervousness in Sakura brimmed dangerously inside of her, spilling over the edge and penetrating her confident exterior. She had been so ready to do this as she stepped out of her apartment into the cold winter air, but as her legs carried her further and further into town, she could feel her assurance slipping away slowly; in its place it left behind anxiety and fear. <em>She could do this… she had to do this.<em>

She stood shakily in the vacant street, grasping the edge of Kakashi's flak vest. Across from her stood the doorway of said man's apartment, its windows casting an eerie yellow glow into the street. She peered up at the window on the top level, searching for any sign of life. A strange emotion swelled inside of her as she realized the light was on and the curtain was drawn. _He was home._

She had spent many days here, tossing rocks at the window and beckoning her unpunctual sensei. But she had never _been inside_. She couldn't even remember a time she rang the bell. And now, she was faced with the dilemma that would finally let her into his apartment. Something about it felt wrong…

_But she had to do it…._

Sakura cursed under her breath, starting towards the door. And with a confidence driven only by fear, she marched right up to the bell and rang it. Silence swallowed her up and fueled the panic inside of her. As the seconds passed sluggishly, Sakura could feel her confidence wavering, and she was almost ready to leave when the loud click of the door unlocking stopped her. With another muttered curse, Sakura flung the door open and dashed up the stairs.

At the top of the stairs, Kakashi stood in the open doorway peering at her tiredly. He was stripped of all his usual clothing, and he wore a black, sleeveless undershirt, mask, and a pair of loose, black jogging pants. His usual forehead protector was missing and two mismatched eye stared back at her openly. The change in appearance caught Sakura off guard, and for a moment she felt like she was looking in on something intimate.

Kakashi regarded her with an impatient look, and in an instant, every last sliver of confidence in Sakura was sucked away. She opened her mouth to speak, but only a soft sigh escaped her lips.

"Sakura, what are you doing here this late?"

She bit her lip and thrusted the vest towards him. Heat burned in her cheeks as she stared back at him, bewildered. It wasn't her plan to get rid of the bait so quickly, but the change in Kakashi's appearance had knocked the sense straight out of her head.

Somehow, she finally found her voice, and she opened her mouth ready to answer him when a loud, thunderous sneeze interrupted her. She sniffed, leaning forward and plucking a Kleenex from her pocket. As she blew her nose, she peered up at him sheepishly. She was sure she hadn't been this embarrassed in all her young years.

Kakashi shook his head, sending the sickly girl a disappointed frown. Kicking the door open behind him, he motioned for her to follow. Sakura stared, befuddled, as she watched his silver mop of hair disappear inside the door. She hesitated for a moment before she finally surrendered, trudging in behind him.

What she saw was entirely what she expected. Kakashi's apartment was small and scantily furnished. Everything had an obvious purpose, and nothing could be deemed useless. Even the bed was decorated with only one pillow and a simple shuriken-printed blanket. Two small pictures frames perched neatly above his bed were the only sign of personalization.

Immediately, Sakura gravitated towards them. She snatched the frames in her hand, and cradled them closely as she stared down at them. One was a picture of Kakashi and his team at a young age. The other was a picture of her and the rest of team 7; the same picture she had hanging in her living room.

She smiled fondly at the young faces before her. _So much has changed since then. _That was a time when Sasuke was just another part of team—an anchor in her small family. Things couldn't be any more opposite now.

She sighed, tracing her finger over the glass. Letting her eyes linger on the portrait of herself, she was suddenly aware of how different she was then. Becoming a ninja was a goal fueled by vanity only, and her feelings for Sasuke were the only thing that mattered. Even her dislike for Naruto was childish and arrogant. She frowned at that thought, abruptly aware of the disappointment in her former self. And now, when she finally felt confident in herself, she was faced with a life changing event that could take away all her hard work in the blink of an eye.

She shuddered, returning the frames to their original resting place. When she turned around, she was startled to see Kakashi leaning against the kitchen doorway, staring at her with serious eyes.

She dropped her eyes and sighed, gripping the edge of his vest. "I-I came to return this. Thank you for letting me borrow it yesterday." She chuckled inwardly, motioning to her pale, feverish complexion. "Obviously, I got what I deserved for being so foolish."

Kakashi stepped forward and retrieved the vest. He paused, and then presented the vest to her. "We both know that's not why you're here."

Sakura's eyes widened briefly before a look of defeat settled in the creases of her frown. She bit her lip and sighed, feeling the anxiety brimming inside her again. She wished she could just come out and say it—_Kakashi-sensei, I'm pregnant and I've no idea who the father is! Got any clues?_ But it was hard enough to talk to the man about idle things like mission briefings or even the weather. How was she supposed to find the courage to expose her heart so openly?

She didn't have time to ponder it any longer as she felt the building pressure of sneeze rise in her sinuses. Before she could contain it, she heaved forward and let it out.

AAA-CHOO!

Kakashi raised a silver brow at her before stepping closer and laying a cool hand over her forehead. The heat of her flesh burned into his hand, and he winced.

"Sakura, you have a fever. What are you doing here? You should be at home in bed."

He grasped her elbow gingerly and steered her towards the loveseat. Once there, he pushed her into a sitting position and retreated to the kitchen. Sakura watched him as he worked among the cabinets, retrieving two matching mugs. He flicked on the tea kettle and made his way back towards her, a cool washcloth wringing in his bare hands.

Kakashi sat down beside her, his weight springing the cushion beneath her. Sakura sighed in heavenly relief as he placed the washcloth on her burning forehead. The sweet sensation of cool water on her skin almost made her disregard the proximity between them. _Almost…_

The silence was suddenly deafening, and Sakura fought to calm the hammering in her chest. She gulped once, squeezing her eyes shut and searching her mind for the courage she desperately needed. Luckily, Kakashi picked up on her anxiety, and made an attempt at small talk.

"Somehow I find this oddly humorous. The medic shows up at _my house _in dire need of care. Hmm…"

Sakura blushed, somehow darkening the color in her feverish cheeks even more. She knew Kakashi was a smart man… _too smart, in fact._ He was acutely aware of her anxiety and he was seizing it as an opportunity to ridicule her. She should've known it would end up this way. So she counteracted the only way a student would know how—careful, yet defiant opposition.

"It depends on how you define 'dire'"

Kakashi raised a brow at her, a slight smirk settling in the wrinkles of his eyes. His mismatched sharingan eye clashed with the sparkle in his other, coal-colored one. "Oh, says the girl who stayed out in the cold all day out of sheer despondency?"

His words startled her, and she paused, wondering how long he'd seen her sitting there yesterday. Had he seen her leaving the clinic? Did he already know?

She quickly corrected her train of thought, though, not ready to allow herself such thoughts. She smirked up at him, hoping to continue the carefree banter between them. "Was it despondency or rumination?"

"I hardly think someone who's crying is ruminating."

The seriousness in his words grappled the heart of the conversation and sent it flying in the other direction; Sakura felt dizzy all of the sudden, and all she could feel was the heat of his eyes on hers. She bit her lip in desperation, trailing her eyes back to the picture frames sitting quaintly above Kakashi's bed.

"Do you miss it sometimes…?"

Kakashi followed her line of sight and nodded quietly. "I have nostalgia for those days, yes. But I think I have regret more than anything."

Sakura's eyes widened and she turned to face him again. "Regret?"

He was quiet for a moment, his eyes staring blankly into the air. And then he spoke, his voice a low, pensive melody. "I've always taken responsibility for the way things turned out."

Instinctively, Sakura reached out and touched the top of his hand gingerly. "You can't say things like that, Kakashi-sensei. Sasuke was a lost cause. His soul was filled with a darkness none of us could reach."

Kakashi stared down at the dainty fingers closed over his. His eyes bore deep into the flesh, and Sakura flinched, immediately retracting her hand. She folded it awkwardly in her lap.

She was failing miserably at this confrontation. Kakashi was a highly enigmatic creature, and even though she opened the line of conversation with lightheartedness and banter, he still found a way to close her off. She hadn't a clue how she would address the conversation she desperately needed to have.

She sighed, suddenly surprised by a thought that popped up in her mind. "Tell me about your team with Minato…"

Kakashi stiffened beside her, his fingers gripping the edge of the loveseat. Instantaneously, a thick, heavy air surrounded them, chocking off their air supply. Sakura sat precariously beside him, acutely aware of the shift in aura, and she wondered furiously what she had said wrong.

Silence descended, and Kakashi narrowed his eyes, as if he was pondering something very momentous. And then, after what seemed like an eternity, he turned to face her, regarding her with a crushing sadness.

"You don't… remember?"

The way he said it made Sakura realize something very critical, and in an instant, her heart dropped strait out of her chest.

"What…?"

All of a sudden, memories of the mission three months prior came rushing into her mind feverishly. In a dizzying array of images and emotions, she saw a glimpse of her and Kakashi, fighting side by side, chatting leisurely over a campfire, traveling quietly in a comfortable ambience. Her head swam in stricken fervor, pocketing her memories and organizing them one by one; and then, suddenly, she felt it—a missing connection, a gap in her synapses.

Panic gripped her heart, squeezing tighter and tighter until breathing was impossible. "What… are you talking you about?"

Kakashi stood, suddenly, stalking across the room until he was as far away as the enclosed walls would allow. He kept his back to Sakura, folding his hands neatly behind him.

Something struck a delicate nerve inside Sakura, and she felt the heat of anger building inside her. "What are you talking about, Kakashi-sensei?"

Her voiced bellowed loudly, and in any normal situation, she would've been surprised by the tone in her voice. But the rage was taking over, holding an alliance with the panic swimming in its wake, and she could no longer turn back.

Sakura stood abruptly, the cool washcloth flinging to the floor violently. It hit the floor with a thud as she lunged forward, catching up to Kakashi in two, short strides. As she lurched to a stop, she reached forward to grasp the back of his shirt, but pain lanced in her forearm as something stopped her.

Kakashi held Sakura's wrist tightly, staring down at her with an intense, paralyzing gaze. It took her a moment to realize what was happening as his left eye began spinning, a whirling blur of red and black. She gasped as she recognized the hypnotic state of mind pushing down on her consciousness. Instinctively, she squeezed her eyes shut, sending a surge of powerful chakra to the retinas of her eyes.

"What _the hell_ are you doing?"

Sakura pushed Kakashi away, stumbling backwards in the process. Rubbing furiously at her eyes, she turned her back on him, desperate to escape the power of the Sharingan.

"Sakura…"

"_Leave me alone!"_

Sakura started for the front door hurriedly, her heart pounding furiously in her chest. In her foolish attempt to search for the truth, she had forgotten that Kakashi could easily use the sharingan to see the truth _she_ had hidden. It wasn't something she was ready for. _No… She couldn't allow him to violate her that way…_

As her hand grasped the cool metal of the doorknob, Kakashi's voice steeled her, making her freeze in her tracks.

"You can't always run away, Sakura."

His words echoed in her ears, but Sakura refused to listen. She wrenched the door open in one swift movement, slamming it behind her.

It wasn't until she was in the streets, panting as her legs pushed forward, that she'd heard what he said:

_You can't always run away…_

* * *

><p>AN: Thanks for the reviews! I hope you enjoyed the 2nd installment! Many more to come!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thank you all so much for the reviews and the story alerts! It means a lot to me that you've taken interest in my story. Please, if you have a quick moment, send me a review and let me know how you think the story is going. There's so much more to come, so hang tight!

* * *

><p><em>You cut me down to size<br>And opened up my eyes  
>Made me realize<br>What I could not see_

* * *

><p>"There's something wrong with your student."<p>

Kakashi stood rigidly before the Hokage's desk, his hands folded neatly behind him. His exterior projected a tedious aura, but the heaviness of his words hung thickly in the air, catching the eye of a usually indifferent woman. Tsunade was no fool; she knew her knew shinobi like the back of her hand, especially the silver-haired man standing before her, and his actions were unusual, raising a prick of awareness in the back of her mind. Kakashi was not one to intrude in the personal affairs of others, so his brash warning about Sakura left her feeling a little more than suspicious. Something weighty must be going on for him to approach her so openly.

Tsunade paused in her writing, looking up from the scroll laid out on her desk. "What causes you so much concern that you'd approach me in the middle of my work?"

Tsunade never beat around the bush, especially when her work was interrupted. However, she was suddenly interested in what Kakashi had to say. She reflected on Sakura's strange behavior the past few weeks and her promise to visit the clinic a few days before. Sakura had returned to work today, looking pale and distressed—overall a lot worse than she had before—and Tsunade would be a fool to not distinguish that. But she, as well, was not a woman to intrude in the personal affairs of others. She figured Sakura just needed to time. She was a fairly emotional girl, after all. But somehow, Kakashi's presence in front of her made her feel a lot more concerned—a feat that was hard to reach at times.

Kakashi stepped forward then, bowing his head in concentration. "I believe something… has happened to her."

Tsunade sighed in clear annoyance, not appreciating his vague answer. "Has she been injured?"

Kakashi furrowed his brow briefly before regaining his schooled expression. "I believe she has been compromised, somehow."

Tsunade's fist smacked the top of her desk, and she stood abruptly, sending the silver-haired man a warning glare. "I don't really appreciate you interrupting my time to give me wishy-washy answers. If something is truly wrong with Sakura, I'd hope that you could tell me honestly and quickly so I can get back to my work."

"I understand, Tsunade-sama. What I mean to say is Sakura has somehow gained selective amnesia, and I fear that something greater may be going on."

Tsunade sat slowly in her chair, registering his words. She raised a pale brow in open confusion. "Amnesia? How can you be so sure? Has she told you this herself?"

Kakashi shook his head, letting his free eye drift towards the fogged, wintry glass behind the Hokage. "No, she hasn't. But we were talking about a previous mission, and she seemed to have forgotten something."

Tsunade suddenly looked irritated. "You think she's gained amnesia because she doesn't remember the small details of a mission?" She sighed, pointing a slim finger to the doorway. "Kakashi, you're wasting my time right now, and I don't appreciate it all. It'd be best if you just leave me be."

Kakashi narrowed his eyes, disregarding Tsunade's command. "No, I disagree, Tsunade-sama. This was not a _small detail_. On the contrary, this only affirms my suspicions for the strange way she's been acting lately."

Something fierce crossed Tsunade's face briefly, but it dissipated quickly as she realized the immensity in Kakashi's voice. Silence stretched between them as she chewed her lip idly, obviously stewing something in her mind.

"Yes… she has been acting, strange. I've wondered that myself, but I've disregarded it easily considering Sakura's past with her emotions." She sighed heavily, shaking her head in exasperation. "But I still don't see how Sakura's personal life affects the fate of Konoha. In fact, I'm not even sure why we're still talking about this."

Tsunade eyed the man before her carefully, taking in the uneasy posture and the pressing concern hidden deep within his stoic face. Everything inside her was praying to move on with her day and forget everything about the personal life of her pink-haired student, but something monumental in the way Kakashi stood before struck her hard, and she felt herself slowly giving into her motherly instincts.

She sighed one last time, waving a hand at Kakashi to signal the conversation was finished. "Alright, I will look into it. But don't expect me to spend loads of time on this. I can assure you, there are much more pressing issues at stake here."

Kakashi nodded once, feeling accomplished with the conversation, and turned to leave. But as he slid the door open and continued his pursuit out the door, Tsunade's voice stopped him.

"I hope you'll be smart enough to not let this interfere with your mission to assassinate Uchiha Sasuke."

Kakashi paused momentarily, nodding his head pointedly and then shutting the door behind him without a word.

* * *

><p>Sakura wasn't sure how she hadn't seen it before. She knew she had been feeling off kilter lately, but it was inexcusable, and she suddenly felt absolutely appalled by her lack of insight. As she stood there dazed in front of her mirror it was all she could see, billowing out from beneath her clothes. The skin over her abdomen, though still taut and stretched snug against the muscles, had a faint, protruding bump pulling outwards. It made her appear as though she was bloated—as if she had eaten entirely too much for dinner, but Sakura knew she wasn't blessed with something as curable as that. <em>No…<em>

That bump beneath her flesh represented something much more enormous, and she suddenly felt very dizzy by the crushing awareness of it. She fell to her knees and clutched tightly at her ears as a deafening buzzing sound overwhelmed her, knocking the air straight out of her lungs.

She had been standing there over an hour, rehashing the same unbearable fact repeatedly. Just as she had the courage to stand and face her profile yet again, she would run her hand over the skin of her stomach, and, all at once, the agonizing panic would rush inside of her again, deeming her conquered.

She had originally found herself in that situation in hopes of finding an outfit for the Konoha Winter Celebration. Though dreading the whole event through and through, she _had_ promised Naruto she would come, and she couldn't find the strength inside her to let him down. She had approached her closet convinced she'd find something appropriate to wear, but when she caught sight of her profile in the mirror, her condition suddenly became frighteningly tangible. _She was scared to death…_ How would she ever face this? She felt as if she was racing a clock, and the seconds and minutes couldn't pass any faster. She was already 13 weeks pregnant. She only had a few weeks to decide if she could go through with abortion, which she was adamantly sure she wouldn't. But what options did she have left after that? Adoption was definitely an option that was accessible, but it was also an option that put her reputation at stake. Could she face the world carrying a bastard child who had no father that she knew of? Would she be able to move on from her life afterwards without the destruction of judgment?

Sakura had thought about it all dreadfully—every last detail. She had imagined the reactions of all her friends and family, and the subsequent feeling of exile she would have to face as well. Her mother, who had always been disappointed in her choice to be ninja, would surely be the most upset. She would indefinitely blame the whole thing on her career as a kunoichi, which Sakura technically couldn't deny, and shun her only child away as if she was the most disgraceful thing to the Haruno name. Was she? She wasn't sure anymore, because she hadn't of clue how she got in this situation in the first place.

It wasn't her mother's banishment that she dreaded most, however. For some reason, fear clamped hard around her heart when she thought of what Tsunade's reaction would be. Tsunade had become a parental figure that she found herself looking up to more and more each day, and it frightened her to think she'd find disappointment in Sakura. Just thinking of it made the heartache feel fresh and current. Would she be able to forgive Sakura and continue her training with her? Or would her perception of Sakura be forever changed? Pondering that made the world around her fade to black, spinning and lurching out of control.

Sakura sighed, suddenly feeling very fed up with her wallowing emotions. Sitting there in a daze wasn't helping her situation at all. If anything, it was only taking what determination she had left and stomping on it. She had to eventually figure all this out, but first, she knew, she had to focus on the task at hand—The Konoha Winter Celebration.

After lingering for only a moment on two different outfits, Sakura chose a loose-fitting, red poncho and a pair of black leggings. Zipping on her knee-high boots, she stomped out of her apartment and into the cold, winter air without any regard to the fear creeping up inside her.

It only took her a few minutes to recognize the building crowd in the middle of the village. People seemed to be talking animatedly and motioning towards a towering Christmas tree in the distance. Its forest green pine was decorated with glittering ornaments and thousands of unlit lights. Perched at the very top was a sparkling star, stretching high into the darkened sky. For a moment Sakura felt enamored standing there in its remarkable beauty, and she had completely forgotten where she was until a flash of orange and yellow appeared by her side.

"Sakura-chan!"

Naruto beamed happily, pulling her into a crushing bear hug. Sakura choked against his grasp, but, in an instant, she felt a familiar smirk tugging against her lips.

"Naruto… calm down! It hasn't been that long since I've seen you."

Her peered up at her with endlessly blue eyes. "I know, but I'm just so happy you came. I've been hoping to cheer you up lately, and I know how much you like the Tree Lighting Ceremony!"

Sakura felt genuinely happy for a moment, and she smiled easily at her blonde friend. She was currently lost in the bursting happiness of her teammate, that she hadn't even noticed the raven-haired girl standing apprehensively behind him.

"Hinata…"

Sakura's smile faded instantly, and her heart sagged at the sight of her. It had been the first time since Sakura had seen Hinata since that day at the clinic, and her face was a fresh reminder of all the choking emotions she felt. She truly liked Hinata, but now her vision of her would always be tainted by the burden of that day.

Hinata pursed her lips uneasily, a faint blush staining her cheeks. "Sakura-san, how are you?"

The strain in her voice was acutely obvious, but Naruto was infinitely naïve, as usual. Sakura could see the pity in her eyes, and she hated it more than anything. She had never wanted to come to this—a walking pity party. Hinata had not intended it that way, she knew, but it was hard to contain an emotion like that. Sakura knew she'd feel just as sorry for Hinata if she were in the same situation.

"I'm doing much better. Thank you, Hinata." She nodded at her friend, and was surprised by the prickle of tears that built beneath her eyes. She turned away quickly, hoping to hide the sorrow in her face.

Naruto was completely oblivious to the stifling aura in the air, and he pumped his fist in the air. "Alright! They're getting ready to start the Tree Lighting Ceremony! Let's go!" He took off through the crowd, pulling his female friends behind him hastily.

Sakura struggled to keep up with her exuberant teammate as he pushed his way through the crowd roughly as if he had every right to. She found herself apologizing profusely to every person he elbowed and pushed, and by the time they had reached the front, she felt exasperated and tired—definitely not in the mood for holiday cheer. Naruto turned to her, completely disregarding the short look on her face.

"Sakura-chan! Look! It's starting!"

Sakura chanced an understanding glance at Hinata, who stood anxiously next to Naruto. The raven-haired girl returned it with a shy smirk. Before they knew it, everything around them stilled to silence, and all pairs of eyes were on the colossal tree in the center of the crowd. Suddenly, a burst of orchestral music surrounded them, and the crowd clapped noisily as a string of multi-colored lights lit with each fall and rise of the tempo. It really was beautiful, and as Sakura watched the lights dancing with the music, she remembered why she had come in the first place. A moment of fleeting awe and contentment was exactly what she needed to get her mind off things.

She sighed nostalgically as a wave of serenity washed over her. She remembered the first time Team 7 had come to see this show. Sasuke had bemoaned it the whole time, of course, but Naruto and Sakura had watched intently with astonishment filling their saucer-sized eyes. She had turned to Kakashi with wide eyes, who returned her wonder with a fulfilling smirk. He loved his students, albeit, but at times he had a hard time showing it through his stoic exterior.

The thought of Kakashi made her heart throb in pain suddenly, and she frowned as she thought of their last encounter. She knew that she had overacted at the sight of the Sharingan, but the fear of exposure was too great. She didn't want Kakashi to see what she had hidden, and she especially wasn't prepared for the shame she would see in his eyes subsequently. But something about that night was terribly unsettling for her. Something in his face had proved he knew something she didn't, and it bothered her greatly that he couldn't share it freely with her. Had he known something about what happened to her on that mission? Or, worse, had something happened between them that he couldn't bear to admit? Sakura wasn't even sure where to begin at that thought. She and Kakashi shared a very cookie-cutter student/teacher relationship, and although they cared for each other immensely, she could never imagine extending it beyond basic camaraderie. But the look in his face showed a hidden emotion she had never encountered. It seemed foreign to her, as if it belonged to someone entirely different. It pained her to think that she'd eventually have to get over her fear and face him again. She'd have to tell him about the pregnancy, and, in return, maybe he could offer her the answers she needed.

Sakura sighed heavily, suddenly feeling very overwhelmed with anxiety. As she watched the bright lights building in crescendo with the music, she fought the stifling emotions inside her. She wished she had the strength to just face him and get it over with, because if it's one thing Sakura knew, it was that she was running out of time. She had to put all the pieces back into place so she could make a decision for herself and the helpless unborn child inside her. But would the answers really determine the fate of her decision? Sakura could never seem to find the answer to that question, but she pressed on, nonetheless, knowing that at least she could come to understand why she was in this situation in the first place.

As the music faded to a stop, the crowd let out a thunderous roar of applause, breaking Sakura from her thoughts. She turned and sent Naruto a lackluster smile as he hollered loudly and pumped his fists in the air. Hinata was giving Naruto a similar look, and, for a moment, the two girls shared a cognizant glance, as if they knew exactly what the other was thinking. Hinata's face softened and she sent Sakura an assuring smile, as if to say _I'm here when you need me._

Sakura smiled stonily, letting her eyes trail away. She knew Hinata cared for her and that their relationship would always be deeper now, but she wasn't sure she was ready to face reality so easily. She was content fretting over something that really had no meaning to anyone but her. But once the word was out…

Sakura shuddered, squeezing her eyes shut. She had to face it, she knew. But she just needed a little more time to prepare… a little more time to appreciate the simplicity of her life as it is now. And right now, she would do that by enjoying a celebration with her friends without any discrimination.

But just as she had pep talked herself into facing the rest of the night, Sakura peeled her eyes open and caught sight of something that stole the air greedily from her lungs.

_Kakashi…_

He stood placidly in the distant, hands shoved deep into his pockets. His visible eye watched her intently, and Sakura shivered instinctively under his gaze. For a moment, all that existed was the heat of his watchful gaze and the increasing thrumming of her heart. Sakura swallowed uneasily, desperately fighting to break the trance she was in, but her eyes remained on his, unmoved and searching as raptly his.

"Sakura-chan? Did you hear what I said?"

Naruto's intrusive voice broke her away from Kakashi, and she finally turned. "Hm? Did you say something, Naruto?"

Naruto sighed noisily. "I said Hinata-chan and I are going to find the rest of our friends. Are you coming?"

Sakura blinked, suddenly remembering her surroundings. "Oh. Yes, of course."

Naruto looped his arm over Hinata's shoulder, producing a very bright blush on the raven-haired girl's face, and Sakura couldn't help but smile at the utter innocence. She wondered how close Naruto and Hinata would have to get before Naruto would finally notice the timid girl's feelings. She turned to follow her friends' departure, but for a moment she paused, chancing a glance over her shoulder.

Where Kakashi stood just a moment before was now just an empty space in the crowd.

* * *

><p>The Konoha Winter Celebration was quite extravagant this year, Sakura decided. In the middle of town, they had erected several heated tents that were decorated edge to edge with varying holiday decorations. Inside, there were hundreds of small tables adorned with crystal glassware and sparkling lights that stretched from table to table, connecting them in a network of glitter. In the back was a full bar, advertising varying kinds of sake and rice wine. Sakura would normally feel instantly drawn to it, as her other friends had, but now she felt forsaken by the hundreds of bottles, as if they were mocking her very existence. She suddenly felt the overwhelming difficulty of the situation she was in as a pink-faced Ino dashed towards her, sloshing a cup of sake along the way.<p>

"Saakuura!"

Clearly Ino was already feeling a little drunk, and Sakura couldn't help the exasperation in her face as she glared back at her dizzy friend.

"Ino! Slow down! It's not a race!"

Ino slung an arm loosely over Sakura's shoulder, spilling some sake on the floor in the process. "Aw, come on, Forehead! Don't be a party pooper!" She presented her half-spilled drink to her pink-haired friend. "Here! Have a drink!"

Sakura eyed the drink irately, pushing it away with the back of her hand. "No thanks, Ino. I don't want your sloppy seconds."

Just as Ino stuck her tongue out at Sakura childishly, a disgruntled Shikamaru and hungy-looking Chouji appeared behind her. Sakura smiled at her friends, greeting them.

"Hey, guys! Having fun?"

Shikamaru looked hopelessly displeased as he eyed his blonde teammate. "Hmm, I think celebrations like this are so _troublesome._"

Chouji ignored Shikamaru's depressing comment, and smiled widely at Sakura. "Did you see all the food they have? If anything, babysitting Ino is worth it for that."

Ino remained completely naïve to Chouji's comment as she guzzled another long gulp of her drink. Sakura rolled her eyes, turning towards the rest of the group gathered at a nearby table. Hinata sat adjacent to Naruto, listening intently to one of his expressive stories. Next to Naruto, Tenten and Neiji were engaged in a playful argument with Lee, who furrowed his eyebrows furiously. Kiba and Shino stood in the background watching Akamaru chew on a leftover hambone. Even Sai was there, looking very disconcerted as if he was trying to make sense of all the social happenings around him.

Sakura couldn't help but smile, feeling a surge of contentment inside her. She truly loved her friends, and couldn't imagine life without them. She hoped that they could see her the same way, and accept her even after the smoke had settled. But maybe she had been over-worrying about the situation? Maybe her friends would hold no judgment, but, instead, accept her condition as a sacrifice as a kunoichi? It was a well-known fact that the world of shinobi had a common standing ground—anything goes in the name of a mission. Sakura was smart enough to realize that what was happening to her was definitely a red flag cautioning her of something malicious. Whatever happened on that mission had been kept from her intentionally, and her lack of memory was testament of that.

Sakura was suddenly distracted from her thoughts as an awkward looking Sai appeared beside her, holding a cup of sake stiffly in his hand.

"Sakura-san, I've noticed you not taking part in the activities of the others. I've come to present a token of friendship and good will so that you will feel accepted by our friends."

Sai presented the cup to her solemnly, and Sakura blinked, completely caught off guard by her strange teammate's behavior. She paused, not entirely sure how to react. After a moment, she accepted the cup awkwardly, too tired to explain her actions to the socially inept man. If it would be anyone to blow her cover, it would be Sai and his brash statements.

"Oh… thank you, Sai."

Sai nodded once, and then turned swiftly on his heel, disappearing into the crowd. Sakura let out a sigh of relief and stared down at the contents of the cup swirling and sloshing against the rim. She suddenly felt a wave of nausea wash over her as the sickly sweet smell filled her nostrils, and she grimaced, holding the cup as far away as possible without looking suspicious. She knew it would be blatantly obvious if she just stood there holding a cup of sake and not drinking it, especially with her green in the face. Biting her lip nervously, she searched her surroundings for an escape from her predicament, and when she caught sight of the bar, a thought struck her. She could easily get through the night if she walked around holding a non-alcoholic beverage devilishly disguised as an alcoholic beverage. All she had to do was find a way to stealthily approach the bar and ask for a virgin daiquiri. _Yes… it would be the perfect idea._

But as she turned swiftly in pursuit of the bar, she was too distracted to notice the body standing next to her until she collided sharply with it, sending a splash of sake on her black, knee high boots. Sakura blinked as it took her a moment to register what happened. Finally noticing the sticky liquid all over her boots, a burst of rage spilled inside of her.

"Hey! Watch where you're going!"

She turned to glare daggers at the criminal beside her, but her rage dissipated as swiftly as it came when she caught sight of the silver-haired man in front of her.

"You know, you're supposed to _drink_ the sake."

Kakashi stood leisurely before the pink-haired girl, his arms crossed loosely over his chest. His voice was laced with an attempt at light-hearted banter, but Sakura could feel the leery edge behind his words, and she narrowed her eyes in response.

"I think it's _my_ business what I do with the sake."

Kakashi shrugged. "Do what you'd like, but people will start to be suspicious if you just stand there holding it with that sea-sick expression."

Sakura gritted her teeth, taking a step past the silver-haired man. "Excuse me, _Kakashi-sensei ;_ I have something I need to do."

Sakura started towards the bar, but Kakashi quickly caught her wrist, turning her towards him. "Hm, you've been quite fond of running away lately."

Sakura growled, thrusting her hand out of his grasp. "Is this about the other night? _Look_, I'm sorry I was so rude, but I don't particularly like it when you turn your Sharingan on me like that."

Her voice lowered, revealing the pain she really felt. The rawness of her words surprised her suddenly, and she blushed, biting her lip nervously. Kakashi peered down at her, an unknown emotion swirling in his coal-colored eye, and for a moment, silence stretched between them. As the seconds passed slowly, Sakura began to feel more and more perturbed, and just as she felt she'd had too much, Kakashi spoke, his voice quiet and unusually timid.

"I'm sorry…"

Sakura pursed her lip, fighting a strange, constricting sensation crawling into her throat. She knew she couldn't possibly be ready to cry—there was no reason to. But it seemed the sight of Kakashi had rallied up all the fear and apprehension inside her and whacked her in the face with it, like pulling a band-aid from the skin. If anyone was more of a reminder of her situation than Hinata, it was Kakashi. It disturbed her deeply that he held the key to something that should indefinitely belong to her, and she felt angry that he wouldn't share it with her. Why did he have to keep looking at her that way—as if something terribly sad and gruesome happened to her? Sakura wanted to call it pity, but she knew there was something much deeper behind his gaze—something that even she couldn't put her finger on.

Sakura sighed, turning her eyes to the silver-haired man, but she paused when she caught sight of the expression in his face. He was staring carefully behind her, an acutely alert look in his eye as if he hadn't even been part of the recent conversation. Sakura frowned curiously, following his line vision. It took her a moment to realize what was happening, but in an instant, a painful flash of fear struck straight through her heart, knocking the wind out of her.

It seemed all eyes were on her with a look mixed with shock and curiosity. A few people were leaning over and whispering in the ears of those nearby, but most were just staring, aghast—as if they weren't even sure how to react.

_No…_

The battle of emotions inside Sakura was peaking now, clashing and rattling deep inside her. She suddenly felt so many things at once, and her mind raced to make sense of it all, but there was one emotion that stood out, brighter and sharper than the rest—panic.

Her legs felt like stones, and she fought desperately to reclaim the use of her muscles because there was only one thing she wanted to do right now—run, as fast and far away as she could. But before she had a chance to move, a disturbed looking Ino appeared in front of her.

"Sakura… tell me it isn't true…"

Ino's previous drunk demeanor was suddenly nowhere to be found, and in her place was a very stunned and vigilant looking girl. Sakura opened her mouth and closed it again, and slowly she could feel her consciousness floating away until she felt like a stranger looking in on someone entirely different. She knew she should say something—try and form a rebuttal, but the immensity of the attention on her was suffocating her, stealing away whatever mentality she had left.

Suddenly a very troubled looking Hinata appeared, pushing Ino out of her line of view. Hinata's steel blue eyes were filled with so much honest emotion that Sakura could almost feel herself regaining sensibility.

"Sakura-san! I don't know how it got out! Please, believe me!"

Sakura was surprised when she felt herself nod at the raven-haired girl. A stream of tears began springing behind Hinata's eyes, and then, all of sudden, reality came crashing down on Sakura forcefully. She gasped for air, ready to turn and run as fast as she could, but before she could, she caught sight of the crowd parting, and in its wake emerged a very serious looking Tsunade.

"Sakura… You need to come with me."

Sakura could feel the spiraling sensation in her head as she gasped greedily for air. Everything was happening too fast; she wasn't prepared for the intensity of her emotions—for the crushing awareness of her situation. But now, Tsunade was there, looking very grave and silent, and she was forced to face it all head on. This definitely wasn't how she had it planned out in her head…

Sakura swallowed, suddenly realizing that she could no longer linger. And with false, weak courage, she turned towards her sensei and nodded in understanding. But before she could leave, something was drawing her to glance one last time at Kakashi—as if he held the assurance she needed.

But as she turned her eyes towards him, she was shocked by the sheer emotion in his visible eye.

Astonishment… fear… concern…

It was the most emotion she'd ever seen him share with her, and for a moment it was all she could see. But that moment was quickly dissolved as Sakura forced her eyes away from his and turned to face her dying fate.

Somehow, Sakura knew that the tiny baby inside her was suddenly going to become much more tangible.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I'm really sorry it took me so long to update. I've been very busy with holidays and all. Since I feel so guilty, I've rewarded you with an extra-long chapter =D Enjoy!

* * *

><p><em>You may tire of me<em>

_As our December sun is setting_

_Cause I'm not who I used to be_

* * *

><p>"Would you like sugar in your tea?"<p>

Shikamaru blinked his eyes open groggily at the sound of Tenzou's voice. Confusion swept over him momentarily, but it was quickly replaced with annoyance as he recognized his surroundings. He sighed, peering up at his comrade tiredly.

"No, _thank you._"

It was the third time he had nodded off today. But who could blame him? He was tired of strategy and planning. He was tired of battle tactics and jutsus. But most of all, he was tired of Uchiha Sasuke. If he never heard that name again in his life he'd be the happiest man alive. Unfortunately, that was not likely as he was given the blessed task of assassinating the asshole. _What a waste of time…_

Neji, Genma, Tenzou, and Shikamaru had been holed up in a small, private office in the Hokage tower for six hours attempting to gather information to formulate a decent assassination proposal. Unfortunately, they didn't have many leads to locate Sasuke's current location, so it was a little difficult coming up with a tactical plan. In fact, the only man who knew as much about Sasuke as possible was Kakashi, and he was nowhere to be found. It didn't seem like him to turn his back on a mission, especially a mission as important to Konoha as this, but the fresh news about Sakura's pregnancy was sure to rattle his bones a little. They knew he just needed time to let it soak in. It wasn't easy losing yet another former student, especially under such appalling circumstances. However, he was Hatake Kakashi; he could never turn his back completely on a mission. He would come around eventually. Unfortunately they were running out of time quickly. Their two week deadline was approaching fast, and they hadn't made any critical progress. As much as they hated to admit it, _they needed Kakashi_. It was a blow to their egotistical shinobi pride, but it was obvious that Kakashi was the commander of the mission. Other than Naruto, he knew Sasuke like no other; Tsunade was blatantly aware of that, so it was no surprise when she assigned Kakashi to the mission. She trusted Kakashi enough to put the fate of Konoha in his hands, and that was an honor that any shinobi would die to carry. For that they knew he would come around eventually… _at least they silently hoped._

Shikamaru sighed, watching Tenzou busy himself with the tea kettle. As much as he wanted to hate everything about this mission, he knew it was detrimental to Konoha—his family and his home. Sasuke was a sick twisted soul driven by vengeance and hate only. His hatred for Konoha had only grown ten-fold after he killed his brother, Itachi, and discovered the truth behind his brother's intentions to slaughter the clan. Itachi hadn't acted independently; it was the council that had given him the orders to wipe out the Uchiha clan. Inevitably, when Sasuke realized the horror behind his error he vowed to repay his brother's life and ultimately revive the clan. At first, Konoha was vigilant, keeping watch every night and following every lead that indicated Sasuke's location. But years passed and nothing happened. Too much time and money had been wasted and Tsunade was forced to withdraw Konoha from its search for Sasuke. And then, right when Konoha had erased all memories of Sasuke and the history of the Uchiha clan, he struck. In the middle of the night, he swept in and annihilated every member of the council and all their family members—27 people in total. On his way out, Sasuke left a message of flames burning in the trees of the abandoned Uchiha estate: _Konoha falls, Uchiha reigns._ Immediately, Tsunade dispatched every jounin to search for him, but there was no trace. Over a year has passed, and the trepidation in the hearts of the people in Konoha has only increased. No one spoke of it, but everyone knew he'd be back again someday.

And then, out of the blue, he appeared at the edge of Fire country. Neji, Genma, Tenzou, Shikamaru, and Kakashi moved in immediately, but they were unprepared and caught off guard and Sasuke retreated easily. As he slipped away, he chuckled sarcastically and taunted them: _the day of revenge will fall upon you soon; finish your business and say your farewells. _

And now, they knew they had to buckle down and finish the job. The fate of Konoha was at stake, and they'd be damned if they let it fall over a sick, sadistic stab of revenge. It was unfortunate that Sakura's condition had to occur at the same time, because they needed Kakashi 100% into this mission. Time was running out, and although they did not speak of it, their confidence was wavering. The reality of the situation was bearing down on them and squeezing the air out of their lungs. They knew Sasuke could be capable of anything, and it was alarming to think about what he would do next. He would surely hit them where they least expect it.

"It's a shame isn't it…?"

Shikamaru blinked furiously, trying to force his mind back to reality. Glancing over his shoulder, he noticed Genma lounged against his chair, clicking his senbon and shaking his head lightly. Neji glared back at him annoyed, and it was then that Shikamaru realized it was Genma who had spoken up. He wasn't sure why, but he suddenly felt interested in what he was saying.

"What are you saying over there baka?" Shikamaru said, faking an uninterested aura.

Genma stood suddenly, removing his senbon and studying it between his fingers casually. "That Haruno girl… it's such a waste. I didn't even have to the chance to get it in…"

Neji pulled his slate blue eyes into a dark glare. "You're such a Neanderthal."

Shikamaru frowned, leaning his head into the palms of his hands lazily. "What's it to you anyways, Genma?"

He wasn't sure why he said that. It wasn't his business to defend Sakura, but for some strange reason he felt peculiarly sorry for her. Especially because her problems were also Kakashi's and it was influencing his participation in the mission. He just wanted to get the damn thing over with…

Genma chuckled. "Getting defensive, are we Shika-kun?"

Shikamaru sighed heavily, ignoring the impolite pet name and letting his eyelids fall shut. "Not really. But I don't see how it affects you, either? If you wanted Sakura, you should've done it by now."

Genma scoffed, shaking his head. "I never thought anyone could get inside that chastity belt she wears. I wonder what lucky chap got the chance..."

Tenzou returned from his position and sat down in the chair adjacent to Shikamaru. Placing the steaming cups of tea in front of his teammates, he finally caught up with the current conversation. "_Please_, can we refrain from talking about my former comrade that way?"

"Who cares anyways? It's Sakura's business, not ours." Neji spoke from beneath the raised cup of tea in his hand.

Genma ignored their comments, pulling the chair up and plopping down on it backwards. "So who is your guess? My shot's Naruto… he's always wanted that chick. Or maybe even Kiba? The prude ones always go for the animalistic type."

Shikamaru shook his head, feeling very disgusted with the conversation. He didn't want to think about Sakura _that way_… especially with _Naruto. _She was definitely an attractive woman, but she felt like more of a sister to him. It made him sad to think of how driven she was and how successful she had become—it was all just an afterthought now. She'd most likely end up just like Kurenei, scraping to pay her bills and having to pass up her shinobi career completely for an annoying little tot. _What a waste of talent, _he pondered.

Neji gritted his teeth, growling under his breath. "Just drop it, Genma. We have much more important things to tackle right now."

Genma held up his hands. "Alright, alright… Still, you can't help feeling sorry for the poor girl."

Genma had an annoying habit of always wanting to have the last word in the conversation. Normally it would aggravate the hell out of Shikamaru, but right now something troubling was settling in the pit of his belly. He kept thinking about Sakura, about the intensely sad look on her face the night before, about the fear that swept in her eyes briefly before she left with Tsunade—it all seemed wrong to him.

Something deep in the back of his mind was telling him there was something much more enormous behind Sakura's pregnancy…

* * *

><p>Shizune sat precariously at the desk in the corner of the Hokage's office, watching the madness unfold in front of her. Kakashi had shown up a few minutes before, and as she had expected, he had argued relentlessly against Tsunade's decision of Sakura's fate. Tsunade was quickly losing her cool, though, and Shizune was beginning to fear the fate of <em>her<em> existence. She cowered deeper into her desk, folding her palms over her ears.

"Tsunade-sama! This is insanity! You can't send a pregnant kunoichi on that long of a mission!"

Tsunade glared darkly at the silver-haired man in front of her. "I really don't appreciate you disputing my orders so disrespectfully! I understand completely what I'm doing, and it's for the better of Sakura _and Konoha."_

"Is it really that easy to put your best medic in danger that way?"

Tsunade stood abruptly, slamming her palm onto the pile of scrolls scattered on her desk. "Silence! How dare you speak to me that way? Do you think I haven't thought about this carefully? Do you think I haven't mourned over the loss of my best apprentice as well? This doesn't just affect you, Kakashi! Think about Sakura and her fate! Think about that young girl being forced into motherhood without a single choice!"

Tsunade's voiced echoed loudly in the room, and Shizune ducked haplessly behind her desk. Silence descended momentarily as two chestnut eyes held one coal-colored eye in an intense, foreboding gaze. Kakashi remained unmoved, returning Tsunade's stare with an equal coolness.

After a long, endless moment, he spoke silently. "I have thought about it, my lady… more than you can imagine. That's why I can't let you send her on that mission alone."

Tsunade sighed, sinking in her chair in defeat. She was too tired to deal with Kakashi today. The news of Sakura's pregnancy had sucked the life straight out of her. She wasn't even sure how she would make it through the rest of the day without losing her mind completely.

"_Fine_. I will send an escort with her. But _only _an escort. Once she is there, she will be on her own. It's only a simple medic mission so she shouldn't be in any danger."

"But-"

"No buts Kakashi! I've made my decision and it's final!"

Kakashi let his gaze fall to the floor. Something inside of him was twisting and squeezing his insides and making his head spin. He couldn't let this bother him… not with the Sasuke assassination mission around the corner. But it was too hard losing two students at the same time, especially when one just happened to be his favorite. How could he handle letting Sakura walk out of Konoha for an extended amount of time without any clue of her return? Would she be gone the whole pregnancy? Even after the baby was born…? At that thought his stomach lurched and flipped on itself, making the nausea rise in his throat.

A question popped in his head, and he surprised himself when his voice spoke. "Why are you sending her away instead of keeping her here where she'll be safer…?"

Tsunade was gravely silent for a moment, and she leaned forward, folding her hands in front of her face solemnly. "My job isn't to look out for Sakura's well-being. Firstly and lastly, my job is to ensure the safety of Konoha."

A dizzying surge of emotions washed over Kakashi as he absorbed the seriousness in Tsunade's words. He remained frozen, completely and utterly aghast. After a moment, realization struck him so hard he felt the floor beneath him shift.

"Tsunade-sama… you aren't thinking…?"

Tsunade narrowed her eyes slightly. "Do you think I'm a fool? I know my student more than anything. This situation isn't the result of a lapse of principles. Sakura herself told me she doesn't remember having sexual relations. This is a very serious situation. One that makes me believe this isn't any accident…"

Kakashi's jaw fell open. "An infiltration…?"

Tsunade nodded. "This is why I can't let Sakura stay here. I need to keep her distanced from Konoha. I have to ensure that unborn child doesn't come anywhere near this village until we can decipher the meaning of its existence…" She paused as a dark, somber look swept over her face. "Even if it means putting the well-being of our best medic at stake."

Kakashi shook his head, his mind reeling with the fresh realization. "But why not get rid of the fetus now before it develops?"

Tsunade chuckled mockingly. "You do realize who you are talking about, right? Sakura's heart is too big; she could never willingly end the life of an innocent child."

"Why not just order her to? Sakura may have a big heart, but she would never go against your word."

Tsunade narrowed her eyes darkly. "I may seem cold, Kakashi, but I'm not that cold. I won't go to that extreme until I know this holds any true danger. If I did that, I'd lose my best medic no matter how this plays out. Sakura's timid, but she's determined when she believes in something. _You of all people should know that."_

Kakashi frowned, pondering the truth in her words. If Sakura was anything, it was determined. Once she put her heart into something, there was no backing down. He knew how she felt about the value of life. She could kill without skipping a beat during a mission, but he'd known her long enough to notice the way her eyes softened with sorrow afterwards. It was much more fitting seeing her as medic. She was able to pour her heart and soul into saving lives, and he knew how satisfied that made her. There was no doubt that she would have trouble viewing her pregnancy as a nuisance.

Kakashi sighed, feeling that familiar crushing feeling in his chest. "Tsunade-sama… _please._ Let me escort Sakura on her mission."

Tsunade growled angrily. "How many times do I have to go over this, Kakashi? You've been assigned to the Uchiha assassination mission! Your duty belongs to that mission first!"

"I understand, but-"

"You will not dispute me any longer! I will ensure Sakura's safety on the journey to her destination and I will regularly keep in contact with her. These are my final words on this matter, so unless you have something else to tell me, you'd find it in your benefit to leave me be."

A flash of anger flickered in Kakashi's eyes, but he quickly diverted it with a curt nod. Spinning on his heel, he turned briskly, starting towards the door. As he neared the doorway, Tsunade spoke suddenly, making him freeze in his tracks.

"What happened on that mission?"

Kakashi didn't move, he remained frozen, his back to the Hokage. His shoulders slumped forward in understanding—she didn't have to specify. He knew exactly what she meant.

"I think we both know that's irrelevant, my lady."

Tsunade growled, clenching her fists tightly. "If you're keeping something from me Kakashi, I assure you I _will_ find out and I _will not _hesitate in punishing you."

Kakashi was solemnly silent for a moment as he pondered the right words to say. After a few stifling seconds, he spoke in a hushed tone. "All details of that mission are included in the report I turned into you. If you find anything suspicious, I will gladly explain it to you."

Without waiting for an appropriate dismissal, Kakashi briskly exited the room, sliding the door shut behind him a little too roughly. The door snapped shut with a loud bang, and Shizune yelped instinctively. Realizing her foolish slip up, she shuffled the scrolls on her desk clumsily, attempting to look busy. After a moment, she realized Tsunade hadn't even noticed her existence, and she glanced over at her superior curiously. Tsunade sat in a frozen position staring hard at the doorway Kakashi recently exited. Her eyes were hollow and cold, and the fatigue was showing in the darkened rings underneath her usually exuberant eyes. Shizune frowned, feeling as if she was placed in an alternate dimension. Awkward wouldn't even begin to describe how she felt. She knew she should say something to cheer Tsunade up, but at the moment, nothing even remotely appropriate seemed to come to mind. So, instead, she continued to shuffle the scrolls, hoping that the passing time would alleviate the stiff aura in the room. Unfortunately, it didn't…

After a long, passing moment, Tsunade spoke, her voice barely a whisper. "He doesn't understand…"

The shaky edge in Tsunade's voice startled Shizune, and she paused, letting her eyes drift towards her superior. Her breath caught in her throat when she caught sight of the billowing sadness in Tsuande's eyes.

"My lady?"

Tsunade seemed unmoved by Shizune's voice, as if she weren't even present in the room. She continued to stare blankly at the doorway, her eyes glassy and desolate.

"Things can never be easy…"

After a moment, Tsunade blinked rapidly, abruptly returning to reality. She turned towards Shizune knowingly and shot her a look of exasperation. "Ah, Shizune—fetch this old lady some sake immediately."

Shizune blinked, obviously confused by the hasty change in Tsunade's disposition. She nodded hurriedly and scurried out of the room. After a brief moment, she returned with a tray carrying a bottle of sake and two glasses. Tsunade never liked to drink by herself, especially when she was stressed. Although Shizune never liked to drink at such random times of the day, she was smart enough to never question the Hokage. That's probably the main reason they got along so well.

"Your sake, my lady…"

Tsunade quickly snatched the bottle and poured an equal amount of sake in each glass. Slamming the bottle down clamorously, she reached forward and downed the glass in one, swift gulp. Shizune watched wide-eyed as she poured another glass shakily and repeated the same performance. As Tsunade poured yet another glassful, Shizune reached forward tenderly and placed her hand on Tsunade's wrist, stopping her.

"Tsunade-sama, that's the last bottle you have. You shouldn't waste it that way." She said, peering worriedly at her superior. Shizune knew that fact was entirely irrelevant, but she needed something to say—anything to break Tsunade's reckless train of thought.

Tsunade sighed, releasing her grip on the glass and rubbing her face with her hands. "Shizune, I appreciate your concern, but I'm old enough to take care of myself. I know sometimes it seems I can't, but I can assure you I'm extremely capable."

Shizune frowned, reaching forward and grabbing her glass of sake. Taking a quick sip, she sunk into the chair next to Tsunade, sending her a look of understanding. She knew how hard all this must be on her. Despite her hard exterior, Tsunade really did care about the people of Konoha, especially the shinobi who worked and braved their lives for the village. Sakura was no exception—she had wheedled her way into the Hokage's heart with her resilient determination and caring will to protect those around her. She also happened to be extremely gifted and talented—something that should never be overlooked. Tsunade had embraced that and spent years cultivating Sakura's talents until she had molded her into an exceptional medic—one that was in line with surpassing the Hokage herself. Tsunade would never admit it, but she was proud beyond words in the development of Sakura. She saw her as a daughter she never had, so it was inevitable that the news of her pregnancy would disappoint her. Tsunade felt as if it was entirely her fault, and that all blame should be placed on her. Shizune wished she knew a way to tell her she was wrong, and that as much as she wanted to, she could never completely protect all the ones she cared about.

Tsuande chuckled, breaking Shizune from her thoughts. "It's funny how these things happen… Right when you think you've got a handle on things, life swoops in and sucker punches you."

"Tsunada-sama, there isn't anything you could've done to prevent this from happening."

Tsunade narrowed her eyes at the rim of her glass. "There's always something you can do…"

Shizune shook her head, setting down her glass. "None of that matters now. You need to focus on how to fix the situation at hand. I think you're doing a fine job handling all this. Don't let Kakashi get to you…"

"I can assure you, Kakashi isn't what's bothering me right now. Although, his sour attitude isn't exactly helping…"

Shizune smiled stiffly. "Yes, that's true. But you know how defensive he can be. There may not be many people who can find their way into his heart, but those that do are extremely important to him. He doesn't take that lightly."

Tsunade nodded, but didn't answer. Instead, she stared blankly ahead, idly sipping her glass as she slipped deeper into thought. Shizune fingered the hem of her kimono, desperately searching for the courage to say the words that would quell her curiosity. Since she found about Sakura's pregnancy, she was dying to know what she had told Tsunade. From bits and pieces of conversation, she had gathered that _something _had to have happened on Sakura and Kakashi's previous mission—it was the only scene she could have been in if she was 12 weeks pregnant. But what? Did Sakura remember anything at all?

Shizune cleared her throat awkwardly, and tried out her voice. "Tsuande-sama, would it be alright if I ask you something?"

"Hmm?" Tsunade blinked, turning towards her dark-haired friend. "I suppose. Nothing's stopping you."

"Well, forgive me if I seem intrusive, but what did Sakura tell you? Does she remember anything…?"

Tsunade pulled her lips into a tight frown, narrowing her eyes slightly. "She didn't tell me very much, only because she knows about as much as you and I. Apparently, she doesn't remember anything that could've put her in a situation where she was alone. She said the mission with Kakashi was very routine, and that nothing out of the ordinary happened. However…" Tsunade paused, letting her voice trail off softly. "She told me something happened between her and Kakashi recently."

Shizune's eyes widened. "What…?"

Tsunade shook her head lightly. "Nothing like that, of course. She said she had confronted him about the mission, demanding him to tell her if anything could've happened to her. She said he acted… strange—very suspicious, and that he even turned his Sharingan on her."

"Oh my… Do you think…?"

"_I don't know for sure_, but I don't think so. That doesn't seem like something Kakashi would do. But, even so, it's obvious he's hiding something. The question is—what? And why?"

Shizune nodded, slipping deep into thought. It all seemed unfathomable to her. First, Haruno Sakura was pregnant, and with no knowledge of how. Now, Kakashi was going against the Hokage and hiding things from her, which was entirely out of character for him. He was always a strict rule follower, especially when it came to the details of a mission. There wasn't any other who could take a mission more seriously than Kakashi, so why was it that he was so easily defying what he usually stood strongly for?

Shizune gulped, peering up at Tsunade worriedly. "Are you really going to… punish him if he doesn't tell you?"

Tsunade sighed. "_No_, I will let all of this play out first. Maybe we'll find the answers first. But if at any moment I feel I need to know, _I will_ make him tell me. I just hope it doesn't get to that point. Hopefully this whole situation isn't as big of a problem as I think it is."

Shizune nodded in understanding. "Yes, I hope so too…"

* * *

><p>Sakura choked back another sob, rubbing her eyes until the flesh was raw. She was tired of crying—tired of feeling sorry for herself. It had been over a day since the meeting with Tsunade. But as she sat there, trying desperately to will the tears away, she knew she didn't have the strength—not at the moment anyway.<p>

She had been sitting at the village center over an hour, sipping her favorite hot chocolate from the local coffee shop. She had found herself there in search of the warm, liquid treat in hopes that it would help bring some cheer to her rather gloomy disposition. But despite her efforts, she felt just as awful as she did in the first place. Adulthood often deprived the happiness from simple things, and at that moment, Sakura felt frustrated with the constant reminder of it.

Sakura sighed, squeezing her eyes shut as another barrage of Tsunade's words filtered into her mind. Somehow, she knew everything would be uncovered eventually, but not like this—when she was so unprepared. She was hoping that she could make sense of everything in her mind first before she was forced to explain such a startling change in her life. It's a sickening but inevitable trait of mankind to demand answers. But how could she provide answers when she knew as much if not less than the rest of society? She searched the depths of her mind, swimming in confusion until a daunting thought pulled her up short. _No… not all of society is clueless._ There is _someone _out there that knows what happened, and, for some reason, the image of a certain silver-haired man popped in her mind immediately. And with that thought, a flash of fury spread inside of her violently. Suddenly, bits and pieces of the conversation with Tsunade attacked her thoughts. Tsunade's jarring and stony voice echoed mockingly: _"Why didn't you say anthing, Sakura?" "Disappointment doesn't even begin to describe how I feel." "How are you planning to handle this situation?"_

But there's one thing that stands out more and continuously plays over and over in her mind, laced with the sinking feeling of betrayal: _"Kakashi approached me this morning and requested that I look into what's causing your strange behavior…"_

The words rang in Sakura's ears like the repetitive, dark cackling of a crow at night, and, instinctively, she reached up to clamp her hands over her ears, as if it would make it all go away. She couldn't even begin to comprehend what was going on. Somehow, the safe, cookie-cutter relationship between Sakura and her former sensei had evolved into something much more dark and mysterious. The events of the past few days felt like the chaotic tumble of an avalanche. Everything kept building on itself, falling to the ground at incomprehensible speeds until suddenly, all she could feel was the suffocating sensation of being buried. Buried by confusion, buried by regret…

But, mostly, buried by the fear of the future. Of what will come after all the rocks stop falling and the smoke has cleared. If there was anything that made sense at all to her, it was the she was sure that her life would never be the same again. She was just hoping for some chance to get everything back to some semblance of normalcy. And for now, she'd just have to accept Kakashi enigmatic attitude if she wanted to keep herself on track. Yet, still, she found it hard to not be angry at him. If he really cared for her as she always thought he had, why was he having such a hard time being there for her in a moment like this? Why did he go to Tsuande before confronting her first? In combat, he was always there to back her up, no questions asked. But now, he was doing the opposite of that. If anything, he was betraying her—going behind her back and doing the worst thing possible by treating her like mere a child and not the adult she really was. Maybe she would always just be a thirteen year old girl to him…

_No…_ there was something hidden behind his eyes that suggested otherwise. And for some obscure reason buried deep in the back of her mind, she found herself desperate to discover it.

Sakura growled under her breath, throwing her mind back into the realms of reality. She didn't have time to think about things like that right now. Of all the things she talked about with Tsuande, that wasn't exactly the most pertinent. The kunoichi in her should be endlessly consumed by the thoughts of her upcoming mission—the mission that just might save her sanity in this situation. Any normal pregnant woman would be thoroughly upset to hear she was being sent on a mission far from home that could possibly last months—even a year. But Sakura was nowhere near a normal pregnant woman, and to her this seemed like a ticket to freedom—a chance to avoid the prying eyes of Konoha as she fattens up and nurtures a bastard child growing inside her. It would be the perfect opportunity to let everyone forget about her and her situation, and after she delivers the child and gives it up for adoption, she could finish her mission and return home as if the gossip and talk of her pregnancy were all just a weak tale from the past. Somehow, though, a nagging feeling in the back of her mind wouldn't go away. It stayed there, throbbing continuously behind her temples, and warning her that the situation she's in is more suspicious than that, and surely wouldn't bury itself that easily either.

Sakura quickly whisked that thought away, though, as she picked up the manila envelope in her lap and carefully dumped the contents in her hand. A small thin, scroll slipped into her fingers, followed by a few photographs that fluttered to the ground at her feet. She quickly stooped forward and snatched them up, stuffing them back in the envelope without even a glance. Her attention was focused on what was hidden inside the scroll. Tsuande had mentioned a few brief details about the mission, including that it was a simple medic mission that would require absolutely no shinobi skills. But she didn't mention what her job would entail. Surely she wouldn't be accompanying anyone on a mission as medic. So maybe she would be sent to gather supplies and herbs needed for the hospital? But that would only be a mission that would last a few weeks, not months. Tsunade was very clear when she said the mission would be extremely lengthy, with no visits back to Konoha. Curiosity was getting the better of Sakura, so without any more thought, she snapped the scroll open and let her eyes roam over the details.

At the top of the paper, there was a large _M _marking the class of the mission. _M_ was used to represent a mission that required extensive medical skill only, and was rarely used. Any mission that required any ounce of shinobi skill was marked _D, B, C, A, _or Srespectively. So Tsunade wasn't bluffing when she said it was entirely a medic mission. Sakura wasn't sure she had ever been on an _M_ mission. Her multi-faceted skills as a medical kunoichi always landed her on the missions that required the healing of banged up ninja in battle. She knew _M_ missions existed, but they weren't common because most people who needed medical care would travel to the nearest village for it. The only time _M_ missions were assigned was when the sick or wounded were too ill to travel, or when death was imminent and medics were requested to make the passing as easy or comforting as possible. Sakura gulped, suddenly retracting her theory that this mission could be a ticket to freedom…

Though reluctant, Sakura read on, taking in every detail of the mission:

_Destination: Sasaki Estate, Fire Country; 3 km west of a small, remote village named Harin_

_Client: Sasaki Karako, 29 years old, female_

_Patient: Sasaki Chiyo, 7 years old, female_

_Details: Sasaki Chiyo is the only daughter of Sasaki Karako, a widow of late Sasaki Hokuto who disappeared tragically a year before. Since then, young Chiyo's health has been declining, and doctors are unable to pinpoint a diagnosis. Research suggests the possibility of the cancer, although the true diagnosis remains unknown. Karako approached Konoha in desperation, hoping for a medic that could give daily chakra therapy to young Chiyo. The conclusion of the mission will remain in the hands of the client, or if deemed necessary by the Hokage. All orders will be given by the client, but must remain within the law of Konoha and will be related to the patient only. Any other orders must immediately be reported to the Hokage, whom will then determine the strength and need of the mission and the true desires of the client. Weekly reports written by the medic must be sent to the Hokage via mail service and labeled confidentially. Any violation of these terms could terminate the mission immediately._

Sakura paused, suddenly feeling the weight of the mission on her shoulders. A 7 year old girl. Possible cancer… just the thought brought sudden tears springing behind her eyes. Here she was, wallowing in her pity party, when her problem was far less dire than this 7 year old girl who was fighting for her life. The details of the mission suddenly gave her a different outlook. She could do this. She could make it through these next few months by pouring her heart into the Sasaki family. They deserved a second chance, especially little Chiyo. She deserved the most of all—she deserved _life._

Sakura lowered the scroll in her lap, feeling the strength of determination flowing in her veins. This mission was exactly what she needed. She needed the time away, and with such a monumental task at hand, she could lose herself in someone else's needs and easily forget about her own problems; Tsunade knew that, of course. She was giving Sakura the gift of fortitude, and it was more than anything she could ask for at the moment. In the end, Tsunade was supporting her, despite her trying situation.

That thought filled Sakura with so much bursting happiness, that she had almost forgotten the sadness in her heart until the loud, rumble of voices caught her off guard. Peering up from the scroll in her lap, Sakura frowned at the sight of a building crowd in the village center. She had been so lost in the details of the mission, she hadn't recognized the time—it was lunchtime, and consequently, large groups of shinobi and townsfolk were gathering for a quick bite to eat. Fortunately, she didn't recognize most of the faces, and she was easily forgotten by the crowd. She wasn't exactly ready to face anyone she knew. In fact, it was the first time she had ventured into society since the Konoha Winter Celebration the night before. The faces of shock on her friends still burned behind her retinas and made her insides shudder. She knew everyone would be appalled to hear the news, but the reality of their reactions was still too much for her to handle. However, she was very surprised that Naruto hadn't approached her once. For some reason her heart throbbed painfully at that thought. She was wholly expecting him to beat down her front door and demand answers like no tomorrow. In fact, she found herself waiting for him all night, teeth clattering nervously, her mind racing with the right words to say to her comrade—her best friend. Time passed and he never showed, and for some reason Sakura felt empty... Emptier than she ever thought possible. Had he been too disappointed in her? Was he so angry he couldn't face her before burning off steam?

Sakura's brow furrowed as she fought back another fresh wave of tears. She couldn't think about it any longer; Naruto would face her when he was ready, and she could sort out her feelings then. Right now she had to get out of the open before anyone saw her and ruined her newfound determination for the upcoming mission.

With that thought, Sakura gathered her things quickly and slipped into the crowd silently. Years of shinobi training taught her how to be indistinct and she moved lithely through the crowd, remaining completely unnoticed by the lunch crowd. Sakura traveled quietly for a few minutes, ducking behind the nearest group of townsfolk at any sight of a shinobi uniform. No one seemed to notice her though, so when Sakura neared the street that led to her apartment, she made the mistake of stepping out in the open to cross the village center. Almost as if on cue, the crowd parted in her wake, and the sun shined down brilliantly on her pink hair, illuminating her existence for all of Konoha. Within seconds it was over, her cover completely blown, and all eyes seemed to shift on her. Déjà vu of the night before struck her hard, and she felt as if she was re-living the whole nightmare over again as Ino pushed her way roughly into the open.

"_Sakura!" _Ino's shrill voice carried above the crowd, and anyone who hadn't taken notice of the pink-haired girl before was now acutely aware of her.

Sakura groaned inwardly, letting her head droop forward. Over and over in her mind, she repeated the same thing_—I can do this—_as she awaited the wrath of her very blonde and _very furious _friend. _It was now or never…_

"What is your problem? You don't trust your friend enough to tell me something that important?"

Ino stalked closer, her posture rigid like steel. Her hands were clenched into tight fists at her sides, and Sakura was sure she could see her trembling. But behind the fury, Sakura noticed something else hidden behind Ino's brilliantly blue eyes_—anguish. _Of course Ino would be upset that Sakura didn't tell her. They were best friends and even sometimes rivals, but no matter what, they always told each other everything. It was a hidden decree they shared, and it had never been broken before—until now.

Sakura frowned, steeling herself. She'd have to hold her ground and take the affliction from Ino if she cared at all for their friendship. It would be hard, though, considering Sakura's own hotheadedness. After the smoke cleared, Sakura could apologize and explain everything, and maybe Ino would take it all back. Hopefully, they could return to the friendship they used to have…

Sakura trailed her eyes up, locking them on Ino's. Ino had closed in now, and was standing right in front of her, piercing her with hardened eyes. Sakura gulped, searching deep inside for her voice.

"Ino… maybe we can talk about this somewhere else…?"

Sakura chanced a glance behind Ino's shoulder. The crowd had grown silent, forming a perfect circle around the two girls. Their eyes were watching intently, as if they were waiting for something—something obviously worth their time.

Something fierce flashed in Ino's eyes, making the cerulean blue of her irises darken. "No, Sakura! Let's talk about this _now! _You had your chance to tell me in private, like a good friend would…"

Ino's voice tapered off slowly, showing the true sadness behind her words, and Sakura cringed, suddenly realizing how much her actions really hurt Ino. For a moment, she turned the tables in her mind, and pictured Ino in her situation. She couldn't lie that it hurt her to think of Ino hiding something that important from her—and for so long.

Sakura gritted her teeth and took a deep long breath, filling her lungs with cold, wintry air. Releasing the air in one, swift whoosh, Sakura spoke softly, hoping to hide their conversation from the prying crowd. "Ino, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. It's just that I have no idea what's going on either. I know about as much as you do. _Trust me… Please._"

Ino faltered momentarily, as if she were searching for the truth in Sakura's words. But in an instant her demeanor froze over again, completely disregarding the pleading tone in Sakura's voice. "Oh, please Sakura! Don't pull that damsel-in-distress shit on me! The only way to get pregnant is to have sex. Don't tell me you have no idea what's going on!"

Sakura sucked in a breath as the crowd leaned in closer, obviously becoming more beguiled with the current conversation. "Ino, _please. _I don't want to do this here…"

Ino threw up her hands. "What? What difference does it make? Are you too ashamed of yourself to tell everyone who the father is? Is that what it is?"

Sakura choked on the burning sensation in her throat. She was trying so hard not to cry, but it was taking everything inside of her not to burst into tears. "No…"

Ino leaned in closer, pointing an accusing finger at the trembling pink-haired girl. "Then tell me!" She paused, sweeping her arms out. "Tell us all! We'd all love to hear about the man who finally captivated the Haruno _virgin._"

Sakura let out a sob as the tears finally sprung from her eyes, streaming down her face like spilled ink. The crowd was so silent, so captivated that a meteor could strike the earth and no one would know. Sakura knew she was on stage for all to see; she knew it was her chance to tell the truth once and for all, but for some reason the words never came. Instead, the only thing her voice managed to release was, _"I can't…"_

Ino growled. "You can't?" She chuckled sarcastically. "You hear that Konoha? Haruno Sakura can't tell us who the father of her baby is! Obviously this must be good if you're that willing to hide it…"

Sakura shook her head, pushing away the sadness. She narrowed her eyes at Ino as the anger began spreading inside her like wildfire. _"Stop it, Ino._ You've no right to ridicule me like this!"

"Oh, really? Like you have no right to hide things from me?"

"It's my business, not yours! _Butt out!" _Sakura spat through gritted teeth.

The muscles in Ino's face twitched as a whole new darkness covered her features. _"Tell me, now, Sakura… Who is the father of your baby?"_

Sakura opened her mouth, ready to scream, ready to yell, anything to quell the fury building inside her, but something black and orange in the crowd flashed in the corner of her eye, stopping her. She turned, and all the blood drained from her face when she caught sight of him—_Naruto._ He was standing beside her, staring intently with a sharp edge of seriousness in his eyes that she rarely encountered. The planes in his face were hardened, making his usual cheery features seem fierce and intimidating. Sakura felt mesmerized as she stared back, losing herself in his gaze. Something inside of her was screaming with fear, but it was quickly stomped out by the overwhelming rush of disappointment. Never in all her years with Naruto had he _ever_ looked at her that way…

Ino remained oblivious to Naruto's presence, though, and she reached forward to grab the collar of Sakura's shirt, but something grasped her wrist tightly, stopping her. Ino turned, ready to dismember whoever interrupted her, but she gasped when she caught sight of the intruder. Naruto's eyes bore deeply into her face with so much fury she remained frozen, retreating her previous heated demeanor.

Sakura watched the events unfold with utter bewilderment. Everything seemed to slow to a stop, and every little detail of the scene before her came into focus so fast she felt dizzy; she saw the crescent moon marks on Ino's flesh as Naruto's nails dug in deeper; she saw the wrinkle in the skin of Naruto's furrowed brow; she saw the white glint of Naruto's canine as his lip pulled over his teeth in a frightening scowl. And then, like a wind-up toy suddenly taking off, reality came rushing into view as Naruto released Ino and said the two words she'd never, ever imagine.

"_It's mine."_

All at once chaos broke out in the crowd as everyone gasped in unison. Ino's jaw fell open, and she faltered, taking a step back.

"What?"

Naruto narrowed his eyes and everyone fell silent. For a moment, all Sakura could hear was the heavy rise and fall of Naruto's chest. It consumed her, hypnotized her until her mind was completely frozen, patiently awaiting whatever he would say next.

And then, after an eternity, his words fell out like daggers, swallowing her whole.

"You heard me, _the baby is mine._"

Something unrecognizable flashed in her mind—a disjointed memory breaking through the surface—a pair of gloved hands against a patch of creamy, ivory skin. And then everything went black as the consciousness slipped away from her, entirely out of reach.

* * *

><p>AN: AHHH! Cliffhanger! Sorry about that, but this chapter was long enough, I had to end it somewhere ha ha. I promise I will make up for it. Please review if you can!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Special to thanks to all my reviewers. You've inspired me to keep writing, and I'm also going to be working on some fanart soon. Your reviews truly help me.

* * *

><p><em>Hey, friend why do we hide?<em>

_It's no wonder that were sinking down_

_Why should we stand in the shadows,_

_With so much light around?_

* * *

><p>Light filtered through Sakura's closed eyelids, setting her vision in a fiery, hot pink glow. For a moment she fought the light, swimming in semi-consciousness in search of the blissful slumber that was slowly retreating, but the brightness of the light was persistent, attacking every remnant of sleep she had left. Groaning inwardly, she peeled her eyes open.<p>

Slowly her surroundings blurred into view, and she was momentarily struck with confusion. A window to the left had the curtains drawn open, and the daylight shone brightly through the cracks of the shutters, illuminating every detail in the small room. At first everything seemed foreign to her as she wavered between consciousness and her previous dream-like state, but it was the smell that evoked her, pulling her abruptly into reality—the sterile, pungent smell of the hospital.

Immediately her heart raced as she sat up abruptly in bed. Something pinched the flesh of her forearm, and as she glanced down, she realized it was an IV attached to a bag of saline. Suddenly, all her confusion was gone as her short term memory re-circuited itself, flashing images of her prior situation. A flash of Naruto's face—hardened by the sorrow in his eyes—appeared in her mind, and her gut twisted painfully as his words followed hastily, repeating over and over like a broken record: _The baby is mine…_

Sakura cried outward as reality slapped her hard in the face, but the sound was quickly lost to her as she fumbled with the blankets around her legs desperately. She wasn't sure where she was going, but all she knew was that she had to get out—_now. _She couldn't remember what happened after Naruto's… confession… Had she fainted? Was she sick? She tried hard to analyze every detail in her mind, but the only thing that kept surfacing and burning deep into her retinas was the last thing she saw before everything went black—two gloved hands smoothing down an expanse of porcelain skin. _Was it someone's thigh…? The curve of someone's back…? Was it her back…? _But most importantly of all, _what was it doing in her mind…? Was it her memory or a vision of someone else's…?_

Sakura couldn't think about it anymore. A wave of nausea arose in her throat, but she pushed it away as she hurriedly fingered the tape adhering the IV to the skin of her forearm. She had almost completely removed it, cursing between clenched teeth as the hair on her arm came with it, when a voice startled the sense straight out of her.

"I see you are awake, Sakura-san…"

Sakura yelped, throwing her hands up. It took a moment for her senses to return as she fought to calm the hammering in her chest. Finally the sound of the voice caught up with her, and the familiarity clicked in her brain, sending a surge of dread that turned her blood icy.

Hinata stepped forward, closing the door behind her. She was wearing her usual medic uniform and her long hair hung freely around her shoulders. The sun seeping through the shutters illuminated brightly on her raven hair, and in any normal situation Sakura would've been enthralled by the beauty of its dimension, radiating in deep indigo and amethyst. But right now, the brilliance of it clashed with the lifeless look in her eyes. It seemed as if all the usual mirth had been sucked from her face, leaving behind only a corpse of an expression. Hinata, it seemed, had already heard the _news._

Immediately, Sakura's heart dropped like a stone in water and she fought the sudden urge to cry. But the sorrow was not for herself; It was for Hinata, and all the kind things she had done for others. Somehow, Sakura had betrayed her—ridiculed her—without any knowledge. How could she do something like that with Naruto? No… _she couldn't have… he wouldn't have…_

"Hinata…"

Hinata stepped closer then, and Sakura noticed something in her hand—a foam cup. She held it out to Sakura. For a moment, Sakura sat blinking, staring down at the water rippling in the cup.

"I've brought some medicine—simple pain-killers to fend off any headaches. It was the only thing I could give you that would be safe…" Hinata paused, and a deeply troubled look flashed in her eyes, "for the baby."

Sakura nodded lifelessly, taking the cup. Hinata opened a packet of small red and white pills and set them on the silver tray next to Sakura. Sakura hesitated a moment before snatching the pills up and swallowing them quickly. It was the only thing she could think to do at the moment. She was buying time, desperately searching for the right thing to say to Hinata. An awkward silence swallowed the two girls up, and Sakura began to feel suffocated as a strong urge to regurgitate the medicine struck her.

The silence was almost becoming too much to bear when Hinata finally spoke, her voice oddly contrite. "You suffered from a mild case of dehydration, causing you to faint. Ino brought you to the hospital immediately though, and we were able to get an IV in you quickly. The fluids have been replenishing for a while now, so you should be free to go home soon. I'm sure Tsunade-sama would like a word with before you leave, though."

Hinata turned to leave, and Sakura swore she saw the glisten of fresh tears at the corners of her eyelids. For a moment, Sakura thought about letting her leave without a word, but her conscience was burning deep in the back of her mind, setting all her uncertainties ablaze.

"Hinata, wait!"

Hinata stopped in her tracks, but did not turn, leaving her back facing Sakura. After a moment, she raised a hand to her face, seemingly wiping something away before tucking her hair behind her ear. She cleared her throat gently and turned, finally; Sakura was struck by the utter sadness in her face.

"Yes, Sakura-san?"

All the color drained from Sakura's face, and she sunk into the bed behind her. She wasn't even sure where to begin. She knew she should tell Hinata that it wasn't true—that what Naruto said was a lie to get Ino off her back, but she wasn't sure of anything then. The endless ambiguity in her mind was making her feel dizzy, and she felt as if she was trying to make sense of someone else's life entirely.

"I-uh… what I mean to say is…" Sakura paused, studying the crease of Hinata's furrowed brow. _Tell her Sakura! Tell her Naruto can't possibly be the father!_

After a moment's silence, Hinata dropped her head, slouching her shoulders forward in defeat. It was as if Hinata could visualize the mental battle going on in Sakura's mind and it was too much to bear at the moment. Sakura pursed her lips, gripping the sheets beside her in frustration. _Tell her now!_

Sakura opened her mouth to speak, and then closed it again. And then, finally, after what seemed like ages, Sakura said the only thing that made sense in her mind at the moment. _"I'm sorry…"_

Hinata sucked in a breath and another fresh set of tears pooled in her eyes, threatening to fall. "You don't owe me an apology, Sakura-san. You've done nothing wrong…"

Sakura was standing suddenly, the blankets bunched around her ankles. "No, Hinata! I do! I owe you so much more than that!"

The tears broke free from Hinata's sparkling lashes and streamed down her face. "Sakura-san, p-please… I c-cant-"

Sakura stepped forward then, and the IV pulled tight on her arm. "Hinata you must listen to me! Please! I promise you I have no idea what's going on. I never remember anything with Naruto. You have my word on that, _I promise you_."

Hinata nodded, but the sorrow remained in her eyes. "I-it's ok, Sakura-san… I believe you."

"Hinata, there's something I have to tell you…" Sakura reached forward then and grasped Hinata's shoulders firmly, completely disregarding the pinching sensation in her forearm. "Something I didn't tell you that day at the clinic."

Panic flashed in Hinata's widened eyes. "W-what?"

Sakura sucked in a breath and held it there, searching desperately for the courage she needed. Hinata's wide, frightened eyes beckoned her to continue, as if her words would be the answer to all the pain and confusion.

"I'm a virgin."

Hinata's brow instantly furrowed as a look of bewilderment pressed into her features. After a moment, she chuckled dryly, shaking her head in an almost polite fashion. "S-Sakura-san… I don't understand…"

Sakura shook her head as well, and for a moment she let the frustration show in her expression. "Well, I mean _not technically._ What I mean to say is, to my knowledge I have never been intimate with another man. I have never done… those things… that could make a baby." Sakura paused, and her hands found her scalp in frustration. "In other words, I have no memory of sex. Nothing _at all… _So you have to understand why I was so upset that day. Because _it wasn't right_. _It couldn't be possible…"_

Hinata was eerily quiet for a long moment as she stared at Sakura in astonishment. Silence descended between them, but this time, Sakura felt nothing but satisfying relief. Hinata finally blinked, as if she were suddenly coming to life, and raised a fist to her mouth.

"Oh my… Sakura-san..."

"Hinata… You must believe me when I say I don't remember anything with Naruto." Sakura sighed, feeling the crushing heaviness of her words. "B-but I can't say… I mean, I can't promise that that means nothing _has _happened. Because I don't _know. _Only Naruto could know that, I guess…"

Sakura trailed off, hoping she hadn't said too much. But it was too late. The words Sakura was hoping would help Hinata only seemed to wound her more than anything. The grief unfolded in her face, setting her features in a blaze of anguish.

Hinata nodded curtly, and Sakura could see the choking panic in her eyes. "_Please, Sakura-san…_ I don't think I can talk about this anymore."

All Sakura could hear was the plea in Hinata's voice and it broke her heart in a million pieces. She didn't want Hinata to leave. She wanted Hinata to stay and tell her that she believed her… that she trusted her. But that, Sakura realized sadly, would never happen, and for some reason that thought left her feeling hollow and cheap, like a discarded aluminum can.

So without another thought, Sakura nodded, signifying her release from the conversation. Something unrecognizable seized the breath in her throat as she watched Hinata bow her head once before making her way towards the door. Hinata reached out tentatively and grasped the door knob, but her hand remained frozen around the metal handle. After a long, unbearable moment, she turned and regarded Sakura with a look so oddly familiar yet unbelievably foreign—the same look she gave her that day in the clinic. _Pity…_

"Sakura-san… I want you to know that I believe you and I hope the best for your situation… just… don't forget that. _No matter what happens."_

And then she was gone, leaving Sakura to stare blankly at the wooden grain of the door. Time seemed to stretch endlessly before Sakura, and nothing seemed tangible at the moment; not the hospital gown hanging limply from her frame; not the cold, hard tiles of the floor beneath her feet; not the IV pinching the skin of her forearm and leaving an angry red welt…

The only thing she felt was the regret pushing down her shoulders like the weight of the world.

And then, when everything seemed unbearably out of reach, Sakura curled in a ball and cried herself to sleep.

* * *

><p>The sound of a door slamming stirred Sakura from her sleep abruptly, and she shot up in bed, instantly reaching for anything to use as a weapon. Her years of shinobi training, it seemed, had not been lost to her, and she quickly found a used fork from her bedside table. The muscles in her back tightened and she immediately poised for attack, but after a few moments of furious blinking, reality blurred into view, showing a safe, pristine hospital room. Sakura lowered the fork and let out a sigh of relief.<p>

"Planning on gouging my eyes out with that thing?"

Sakura yelped, and the fork flew from her hand, hitting the floor with a rattling clatter. Sheepishly she turned towards the voice that addressed her, a slight pink tinge warming the color of her face. A few feet away, Tsunade stood with her arms crossed, regarding Sakura with an oddly amused look.

"It seems Sleeping Beauty awakes yet again." Tsunade chuckled lightly, striding closer to Sakura's bed. "You must have been very tired, Sakura. Either that or the baby's sucking the life right out of you."

The tone in Tsunade's voice was very light, but there was a certain ridicule in the darkness of her words, and Sakura instantly frowned, wondering how to accept her comment. It was the first time she had seen Tsunade since the day her pregnancy was revealed, and she still wasn't sure how Tsunade felt about it. Was she ashamed? Disappointed? Angry? The hollow look in Tsunade's eyes told Sakura that maybe she wasn't sure either.

After a moment, Tsunade took a deep breath, as if contemplating something very monumental. Pulling a chair up next to the bed, she sat down with a regal air only a Hokage could have. Sakura was briefly struck by the splendor of her sleek, purposeful movements.

"Sakura… I understand how hard all this must be for you. But you have to stop blaming yourself for what's happened."

Sakura's jaw dropped, and she felt as if something had knocked the wind out of her. "W-what? How can you say that? If I had been more careful; if I had paid more attention-"

Tsunade raised a hand up, silencing her. "Enough. I won't have any of that from you. I didn't teach you to be self-destructive. The Sakura I tutored is strong and confident. I don't tell many people when they _haven't_ made a mistake, because usually they _have. _But in this case,_ I know. _Whatever happened to you was out of your power. I believe that wholly."

Sakura pursed her lips, and in any other situation, she would've been deeply touched by Tsunade's words. Very rarely did she give reassurance, and when she did, it was something to be taken very seriously. But right now, all Sakura could think about was Hinata and the tears glistening in her blue eyes. Somehow, she felt like it was all her fault anyways…

"But Naruto-"

Tsunade chuckled—a dark, disconnected sound, and shook her head. "That boy…" She said, as if Sakura weren't even in the room.

Sakura blinked, suddenly feeling very confused. "Shishou…?"

Tsunade turned her eyes to the window, pressing her lips into a thin line. "I think you need to talk to him, Sakura. He has _many _things to say to you. I'll _make sure _he pays you a visit sometime today."

Sakura stared, her mouth ajar. A flurry of thoughts attacked her mind, but nothing seemed to make sense. All she could feel was the suffocating sensation of bewilderment. She felt as if she were living in some sick, twisted drama, where everyone knew what was happening except her.

Was she saying that Naruto's confession was true? Or was he acting with a different motive? Sakura opened her mouth to speak—to demand answers, but Tsunade's warning look stopped her. It seemed Tsunade was finished with that topic, even though Sakura had only begun. She would have to wait and get the answers from Naruto himself. She knew better than to cross the Hokage.

"Sakura…" Tsunade said, breaking Sakura from her thoughts. "Have you thought about this? I mean _really _thought about this?"

An oddly tender look was in Tsunade's eyes, and Sakura wasn't sure how to approach her question. Was she talking about Naruto and his confession? Or just the baby in general?

Sakura pursed her lips. "I-I'm not sure, shishou…"

Tsunade sighed—a frustrated yet sorrowful sound. "Sakura, this isn't something you can pretend doesn't exist. _This child_ isn't something that will just go away someday. You have to make a decision eventually. I know your loving nature is calling you to take care of it unconditionally. But you have to take care of _yourself_ too."

Sakura felt something twist in her gut; she knew Tsunade's words were true. This child would always be a part of her, no matter what decision she made or even where it came from. But did she have to make a decision now, when everything was so uncertain? And if Naruto really was the father, how would he feel about it? Shouldn't he have a say in the matter as well? Sakura couldn't deny that something seemed wrong about it all. Everything between her and Naruto had been fine up until his odd confession. If something had happened, _really happened, _wouldn't she have some sense behind it? He certainly hadn't been acting like anything had happened between them. And if anyone wore their heart on their sleeve more than her, it was Naruto. His bursts of emotion were _impossible_ to hide. The other thing that was a blaring red flag to her was the loss of memory. Why in heaven's name would Naruto ever alter her memory to hide anything from her? The truth is—he wouldn't. Either Naruto wasn't the father, or the situation had shocked her so much that she had gained selective amnesia. Someone how she knew it wasn't the latter.

"I think I need to speak to Naruto." Sakura said, finally. She flinched a little as she said the words; everything about them seemed foreign and wrong.

Tsunade smiled weakly and the gesture didn't meet her eyes. "Yes, I think you should too."

Tsunade stood then, brushing the wrinkles out of her skirt. Returning the chair to its place in the corner of the room, Tsunade turned back to Sakura, pressing her lips into a thin line. Sakura could see the emotion hidden in her eyes, but Tsunade was working hard to keep up her hard demeanor that she usually carried.

"I'm discharging you from the hospital for now. Your mission starts tomorrow morning, so maybe you could give me an answer before you leave. I know you're already becoming attached, but just remember there is always adoption. I'd hate to see you give up all your ambitions for something you weren't even involved in. Just remember how important your calling as a medic kunoichi is to you before you make any brash decisions."

With that Tsunade nodded stiffly, turning to leave. Just before she reached to doorway, she paused and tossed a glance over her shoulder.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you that you will be departing from your mission alone. Kakashi had begged me to send an escort with you, but I honestly don't have anyone to send. Everyone's too tied up in missions." Tsunade paused, as if debating the importance of her next words. "So if you happen to see him, make sure you don't mention anything about the mission."

And then she was gone, the door clicking shut behind her. Sakura stared at the doorway with hard, angry eyes. _No problem, _she thought, _I have absolutely no intention of seeing _him_ anytime soon._

* * *

><p>It was already nearing dusk as Sakura neared her apartment. The sky above her was set in a beautiful canvas of indigo blue and orange, and she could faintly make out the round shape of a milky white moon rising in the horizon. Normally, she would have been struck by the utter beauty of the oncoming twilight, but the anger inside her was stamping out any pleasurable thoughts she could have.<p>

She just couldn't believe that man. What in the world was Kakashi doing constantly meddling in her business? For years he hardly cared to look her way, only briefly greeting her with a "Yo" if he even came across her in the streets. His behavior had been so strange lately; he had almost become _protective—_a feat that seemed impossible for the usually indifferent silver-haired man. And what was he hiding anyway? What could be so terrible that he couldn't just come out and tell her? For some reason, she didn't even care to find out. Soon she would be gone from Konoha, and she could forget all about a certain copy-nin and his strange antics. She had a mission to tackle, and a future to decide for a helpless unborn child.

She sighed, unable to think about it, though. She knew she had to approach Naruto and figure out what in the world was really going on. A part of her was relieved to think she had finally found the answer to her situation, but the other part of her had her stomach doing somersaults—she just couldn't even imagine what or how something had happened between them. Helplessly, images of Naruto doing those _things_ to her flashed in her mind, making her blood run cold. It felt so wrong, like being intimate with a brother. And then, almost immediately following those thoughts was the image of those gloved hands breaking free from her memory. She held tight to that memory, analyzing it as best as she could; she studied every detail she could pull from her foggy memory—the shape of the hand, the blunt cut of the nails, and the leather texture of the fingerless gloves. It certainly didn't look like Naruto's hands. She had gotten very familiar with his hands through the years of working side by side. His hands were almost boyish and small. The hands in her memory were large and masculine, hardened with callouses that told a tale of a hard and difficult life. Did this mean anything to her? She wasn't exactly sure…

As the pulled out the key to her apartment, a familiar burst of chakra attacked her senses. _Speak of the devil, _she thought as the pushed the door open and greeted the boyish face she had come to know so well over the years. Except this time his face was hard and cold, devoid of its usually joyous grin.

"Naruto…"

She knew she'd have to face him eventually, but she was nowhere near ready at the moment. For some reason a flash of annoyance coursed through her veins, and she narrowed her eyes at the fox-boy in front of her.

"You know, it's against the law to break into people's apartments like this."

Her words were hardened by an edge of resentment, but as usual, the blonde boy seemed unperturbed by her fiery emotions. His face softened and he stepped towards her with open arms. He reached forward to envelope her in a gentle embrace, but Sakura pushed him away roughly.

"What _the hell_ do you think you're doing?"

Naruto narrowed his eyes at her, clenching his fists at his sides. "Don't act all angry with me Sakura-chan! I should be the one that's angry." He paused and something sorrowful flashed in his eyes briefly. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Rage exploded in Sakura so fiercely she felt her vision sway. _"What the FUCK are you talking about? How dare you? _Do you mind telling me what the hell that was earlier today? You've got all of Konoha thinking you knocked me up!"

A red burst of chakra burst around Naruto, and his eyes sharpened like liquid knives. "It's for the best!" In an instant, the frightening chakra dissipated, leaving behind a very sad looking Naruto. "I couldn't stand there and watch Ino tear you apart in front of everyone like that. I had to say something."

Dizziness swept over Sakura as realization set in. She took a step closer and regarded Naruto with widened eyes. "What are you saying?" She said, her voice barely a whisper.

Naruto was profoundly quiet for a moment. "I care about you Sakura."

Tears sprung in her eyes and her head swayed. "So that means that y-you… you and I… we…" She trailed off, unable to bring herself to say the words.

Naruto furrowed is brow, and Sakura was struck by how serious his face looked. She rarely saw him that way, which meant he was pondering something very important to him. He was peculiarly quiet for a moment, and the silence was killing her, choking off her air supply. Why wouldn't he just say it?

"Sakura-chan… I could be the one, if you needed me too. I heard the rumors that you didn't know who the father was, and I couldn't stand the way everyone was talking about you. You are so much better than that. They don't have the right to talk about you that way. It made me so angry…"

Sakura's stomach flipped on itself as she listened. Her heart hammered in her chest as the realization hit her like a freight train. "Naruto… you mean you never… I mean, we never…?"

Naruto frowned, letting his eyes trail to the floor. "No, we've never done that together." He chuckled uneasily, trying to lighten the mood. "At least not that I remember, and trust me, I _would_ remember."

Sakura felt the darkness creeping up, and she knew she was on the verge of fainting. From what, she wasn't sure. Was it shock? Relief? Or maybe it was disappointment with the realization that she was just as far away from the truth as she was before. Luckily, Naruto reached forward and grasped her shoulders firmly, shaking her a few times with excitement. Sakura blinked, and the blurriness of her vision slowly began to ebb, showing a very determined Naruto in front of her.

"But listen, Sakura-chan! We could do it! I could help you get through this. We could tell everyone it was mine, and maybe the others wouldn't bother you so much! You could give the baby up for adoption, or maybe even keep it if you wanted…" Naruto's words were stringing together, and she knew he was rambling out of edginess. "But I want to help you through this. I don't want you to go through this alone…"

The sheer emotion in Naruto's face caused a stab of guilt in Sakura's mind. She knew this was essentially his confession of love for her, and as expected, she didn't know how to handle it. She loved him, _she really did._ But she could never be what he needed, and she wasn't about to let him ruin his life over her problems.

Sakura reached up and removed Naruto's hand from her shoulder gently, giving it a small squeeze of reassurance. She schooled her expression as best as she could, trying desperately to hide the pity in her eyes.

"Naruto, I can't do that to you. I can't let you give up everything in your life for me."

Naruto reached up and cupped her face in his hand. The warmth of his hand burned into her flesh, but it felt foreign and wrong. "Sakura-chan. You're all that matters to me. _Please… I want to help."_

There it was. That instant stab of guilt. But this time it attacked her fervently, making her insides twist. She felt incredibly uncomfortable in his embrace, and she turned her head, releasing herself from his hand. Once again, a flash of Hinata's ghostly expression entered her mind, and she fought the tears. Why? Why did Naruto care for her? He deserved so much better. He deserved Hinata.

"Naruto, _no._ What about the others? What about Hinata?" Her voice was gaining an edge of impatience, and she fought to keep her words soft and gentle.

Confusion flashed in his features, and he tilted his head to the side curiously. "Hinata-chan? What about her?"

Sakura couldn't help it; she chuckled lightly at his utter naivety. "You are really something Naruto…"

Naruto raised a brow at the pink-haired girl, and the bewilderment was obvious in his features. "Oo-kay.."

Sakura paused, taking a deep breath. She smiled honestly at Naruto, and she felt her heart fill with adoration for her blonde friend. Unfortunately for Naruto, it wasn't the kind of adoration you had with a lover, but with a brother you loved dearly.

"I'll tell you what would really mean a lot to me, Naruto. Go and tell all the others the truth, and don't leave anything out. Then I want you to approach Hinata, and _make sure_ you take the time to her the truth honestly. She deserves it. As for me, I can handle all this on my own. I feel like it's my calling to figure out the existent of this…" She paused, skimming her hands over her belly. It felt odd to her—the first time she had ever acknowledged the baby to the world.

Naruto pursed his lips, but nodded. "Okay, Sakura-chan…"

Naruto reached forward and pulled Sakura into an embrace, and this time, she didn't fight it. She felt comfortable in Naruto's arms knowing that no matter what happened he would always be there for her. The rest of Konoha could look down at her in shame, but at least she had him. It would definitely be enough.

After a moment he pulled away from her, keeping his hands grasped on her shoulders. He gave her a tender look, and then, sweeping his eyes towards her slightly billowing belly, he blushed slightly.

"It's really under there, isn't it?"

Sakura couldn't help but smirk. "Yes, it is."

He glanced at her with a nervous expression. Slowly he let his hands trail down and rest on the edge of her belly, and she flinched at the intimacy of the action, but Naruto's eyes shone with wonderment only, like a kid meeting Santa Claus for the very first time. She fought the urge to remove his hands, but the fulfillment in his eyes stopped her. He was truly enthralled by that little life who had no one else but her.

"Would it be alright if I…" He said, trailing off. "I want to say something to him."

Sakura smiled at the _him _in his expression. Of course, Naruto would assume it was a boy. She felt nervous allowing Naruto so close to her that way, but something about the softness in his eyes drew her in, and she couldn't help herself when she nodded.

Slowly, he kneeled before her, placing his ear against her belly. Sakura twisted her hands nervously behind her back, feeling utterly exposed, but she bit her lip, demanding herself to keep it cool.

"Don't worry little guy. Sakura-chan and I will take care of you. We won't ever let you feel alone. I promise."

And what that, he stood suddenly and grinned sheepishly at Sakura. She couldn't help but blush at the seriousness in his words. When Naruto promised something… _he never went back on his word. _It wasn't just his ninja way—it was his promise to himself and the ones he cared for.

"Right, Sakura-chan?"

Happiness swelled in Sakura, and every worry—every fear that she wouldn't be able to make it through dissipated completely. "Right…"

After all, she wouldn't be alone—she would always have Naruto—her very best friend.

* * *

><p>AN: Aww, I really loved writing this chapter. Naruto really is an awesome guy, and I know he would never turn on Sakura. It was really sweet to write their confrontation. So that leaves us back at square one, though… who's the father? He he I can only say it's probably not what you're thinking. Please review! P.S. - Yes, Ino was a bitch. But I promise I'll clear that up later. I actually really like Ino's character…


	6. Chapter 6

_I'm not a stranger, no, I am yours_

_With crippled anger and tears that still drip sore_

_A fragile frame aged with misery_

_And when our eyes meet I know you'll see it_

* * *

><p>That night Sakura slept fitfully. Despite the renewed determination she gained from the conversation with Naruto, she couldn't stop the nightmares from creeping up and holding her hostage. She dreamed of a steady string of faceless men, all bearing the same hands from her memory, and pointing accusingly at her. Everything in her dream seemed like a blur, but those hands—they were so real to her, as if she were really looking at them in real life. She shouted and screamed, telling them to leave her alone, but her belly was growing quickly before her eyes, stretching the skin of her abdomen. And then, after what seemed like a blink of an eye, she birthed a child without a human face—<em>no, the child was much more frightening than that. <em>The child she looked down upon was that of a demon—its eyes glaring brilliantly red at her. A shriek of terror rose from her throat as she reached for a kunai and poised her hand above its evil face and—

She woke up screaming, the sound blood curdling even in her own ears. The darkened surroundings of her bedroom blurred into view, but the terror did not ebb. She panted breathlessly as the sweat slickened her skin, and for a moment, her heartbeat began to recede slowly. Until she heard it—the creaking sound of a window opening. Immediately she retrieved the shuriken hidden beneath her pillow and flung it hard in the direction of the intruder. It struck the wall with a loud thud, and as she narrowed her eyes in the dark to make out the shape standing between it, she caught sight of a very breathless silver-haired man, his legs straddled unnaturally in a stiff position. Between his legs, mere inches from his crotch, was the shuriken she threw wedged deep into the wall.

Instantly, fury seized her thoughts. "What the _hell _do you think you're doing here?"

Kakashi ignored her question, mainly because he was still frozen stiff from the event that just took place. His eyes wide were with terror, but Sakura could still make out the amusement glinting in them. It was then that Sakura noticed his forehead protector, usually slung carelessly over his left eye, had flung off in his attempt to dodge her attack and was lying helplessly on the floor.

Kakashi chuckled dryly. "Oi, you really aim with intent to kill, don't you?"

Sakura glared at him darkly. "I learned from the best, I guess. But you never answered my question, _what are you doing here?_" She wanted to add: _usually you aim with intent to kill when creepy men climb in your bedroom_, but she thought it would be best to leave that part out.

Kakashi slouched into his usually stoic posture, and reached down to retrieve the shuriken. He studied it momentarily, before moving closer and setting it at her bedside table. Instinctively, Sakura pulled the covers around her, hiding her upper body (which happened to be dressed in a very skimpy tank top… with no bra). Her cheeks burned red, and she hoped the darkness of the room would keep her embarrassment hidden.

"Well, do you mind telling me why you're screaming bloody murder at the top of your lungs? Any sane person would want to check out the situation."

Sakura narrowed her eyes, knowing very well that Kakashi didn't happen to be strolling by her bedroom window at 3 o' clock in the morning.

She wanted to yell at him, tell him he was a liar; instead, she said, "You didn't answer the question…"

Kakashi sighed, stuffing is his hands in his pockets. Sakura was hoping desperately he would step further away from her bed, but he remained where he was—only inches away from the edge. And with his forehead protector missing and his silver hair slightly disheveled from her attack, she couldn't help feeling as if it was a very intimate moment. She had never had a man this close to her bed when she was barely clothed, and in the pale moonlight, she felt herself blushing even deeper red.

Kakashi regarded her cooly, as if he was trying to school his expression. "Your mission is tomorrow morning…" He said, trailing off.

Sakura pulled the covers even tighter around her frame. "Yes… _And?" _She snapped, a little more fiery than she hoped. She softened slightly as he flinched at her words. She sighed. "Does that merit you the opportunity to climb into my bedroom in the still of night?"

"I told you, I heard you screaming and I-"

"Just tell me why you're here." She spat, cutting him off. She couldn't remember a time when she was this vicious to Kakashi, but she was quickly losing patience. Not to mention, becoming uncomfortable. Without thinking, she found herself studying his features in the silvery light of the moon. His eyes, which usually seemed half-lidded and casual, seemed to have a nice curving shape with a frame of perfect ebony lashes. The color, she noticed, wasn't brown or black, but the most dimensional shade of dark silver, like the lively color of his hair at night. His Sharingan eye was wide open, but not rotating like their previous encounter, and in the darkness of the room, it almost seemed like a deep red canvas, painted with dots of black. She began to lose herself in his boyish face that seemed so much younger than his years, and everything around her seemed to slow to a stop. And with his dark mask covering his lower face, she hadn't even noticed he was talking until he stepped closer, breaking the trance she was in.

"-so I wanted to ensure she kept her word." He paused, studying her stupefied face curiously. "Sakura, did you hear me?"

Sakura blinked her eyes furiously, and her whole face burned red. _She was definitely just checking out her former teacher._

"What?"

"I said, Tsunade-sama promised that she'd send an escort with you on the mission, so I wanted to make sure you were aware."

Sakura couldn't stop blinking, as if she just spun herself around and around in circles. "Huh?"

Suddenly, Tsunade's words filtered in her mind: _Make sure you don't mention anything about the mission._

Well, she hadn't exactly said _lie to make sure he doesn't know_, but Sakura was no fool. She knew what Tsunade had meant.

"Oh!" She squeaked nervously. "Yes! She told me that I would be traveling with… I mean, the person escorting me is…" She trailed off, and she hoped that the desperation didn't show in her face as she searched for a name that would be safe to throw out. "Kiba! Yes, that's right! Inuzuka Kiba will be escorting me since his sense of smell could ward off any approaching attacks."

_Whew, _she sighed, hoping that despite the high octave of her voice, Kakashi had believed her. He raised an eyebrow questioningly but didn't press the issue, and Sakura inwardly thanked her lucky stars. _Now if only she could get to Kiba before he did…_

Sakura was so lost in thought—concocting ways to warn Kiba about her obvious lie—that she hadn't even notice the bed shift as a very large and very warm body settled itself next to her. Until, that is, a hand reached out and tucked a stray pink lock behind her ear. The blood in her veins grew cold as the hand brushed the skin of her cheek ever so slightly, like a pair of butterfly wings tickling her flesh. And then, as quickly as her blood turned icy, a shot of lightning coursed through her, setting her skin ablaze with heat. The heat spread, starting from the place where his hand settled, and intensifying until it curled deep in the pit of her belly. Sakura couldn't help it—her breath hitched and her head swam in the delicious sensation. All the while, something in the back of her mind was screaming—telling her that this sensation was not foreign to her. She had felt it before with the exact same set of hands.

Instantly, panic flashed inside her and she backed away, the blanket dropping helplessly from her shoulders and bundling around her waist. She knew at the moment she was exposed—the creamy flesh of her neck and shoulders was blinding white in the moonlight, but she couldn't even begin to think straight and react accordingly. _No, she was frozen—_held hostage by the realization that smacked her so hard she was dizzy. How could she..? How could he…? Suddenly all her emotions felt very familiar as she tried to make sense of it all—the same shock, same despair she felt with Naruto's confession filled her mind. But there was something else there—something that reverberated with the curling sweetness in the pit of her belly—_longing._

Suddenly she was standing, the worry about exposing herself completely forgotten as the blanket fell limply around her feet. She fisted her hands in her hair and tried to keep herself from swaying. _No, no, no, _she was saying over and over, unaware that she was actually voicing her thoughts. Her mouth ran dry as her knees shuddered, threatening to buckle beneath her. She would never do anything with Kakashi! He could never… they could never… how could it happen? She was his ex-student, it was so taboo that thought of it made her nauseous. Yet, she couldn't fight it. The sensation was there, making her heartache and her body sway like a magnet drawing her back to him. She drew a fist in her mouth and bit down, attempting to stifle a scream tearing towards her throat.

Meanwhile, Kakashi watched her peculiarly, a strange emotion furrowed into his brow. If she were a stranger, she wouldn't have noticed the flicker of emotion in his eyes—only the stoic, cold posture he usually held. But years of working side by side with the copy-nin had made her an expert at his slight shifts in moods. There was definitely something there—_something he was fighting to keep hidden._ And then with a flicker of his eyes that was so discreet, _so subtle_, he roamed over the exposed flesh of her arms and chest, back down to the curve between her thighs, and then stopping at the slight bump protruding out from her stomach. Silently, he flicked his eyes up to meet hers, as if it never even happened.

Sakura wanted to scream at him; shout at him for thinking she was such fool—for lying to her. But most of all, she wanted to yell at herself for being so naïve to never notice any signs. She tried to think back on the mission again, quickly skimming every detail, but there was nothing. Absolutely nothing was out of the ordinary that made her think otherwise.

Before Sakura could ponder any longer, she felt a hand encircle her wrist and pull her back down on the bed. Reaching over, Kakashi draped the blanket around her shoulders. Nothing about the action was intimate—a far cry from the sensation she felt a few moments ago. Now she really felt confused, and she began to wonder if she had imagined the sensation all together.

"Are you alright, Sakura? You look like you've seen a ghost…" He addressed her as if she were a genin again, watching the eraser blunder down on his head shamefully.

The sudden shift in his mood was outrageous. She was incredibly lost, and the only thing she could do was stare, dumbfounded. For some reason she thought, _well I guess that's what happens when you lose your memory…_

Suddenly, reality snapped back into place, and she blinked at him. "Oh, uh—yeah… I just thought I remembered something."

Her cheeks burned deep red, and the blood rushing to the surface was almost painful. She felt shameful for even thinking something so absurd, and she fought to steady her thoughts. Kakashi blinked back at her with those familiar hooded eyes, and she felt dizzy by the confusion in her head. How could she feel something so strongly, while he just stared at her with that stoic expression? No, she couldn't deny the short flash of emotion in his eyes the moment before. It was there, burned into her memory, but she quickly pushed it away, wholly unprepared to decipher its meaning.

Instead, she smiled fakely at her former sensei. "Well, I guess you should be going then. I don't want to keep you any longer…" The stiffness of her words seemed hurried and forced, but she kept smiling that fake smile, wanting nothing more than the copy-nin to take his leave of absence. She just wanted the mission to begin, where she could go away and forget all about that sweet sensation coursing through her veins.

But Kakashi didn't take the hint. He stared at her seriously, as if he hadn't even heard what she said. Something flashed in his eyes briefly—Concern? Regret?—but it was quickly forgotten as he hardened his expression once more. Sakura was quickly discovering that the copy-nin was quite good at hiding his emotions—even with those he could call his comrades.

"Sakura, why didn't you tell me?" he said, and he couldn't hide his emotion this time—his eyes softened like liquid pools of silver, and Sakura felt herself being drawn in again.

But the question repeated itself in her mind again, pulling her out of her trance. That goddamned question again… Why was everyone asking her that? It was her business who she told and who she didn't tell! She didn't owe anyone anything. She gritted her teeth as the anger spread in her mind.

"Why is everyone asking that damn question?" She said, her eyes glaring upward at the ceiling. She turned her darkened eyes to his and narrowed them sharply. "Why Kakashi-sensei? Why does it matter? You never paid any attention to me before; why now? Why the change of heart?"

And then she was standing again, clenching her hands into fists. The anger in her was taking off rapidly, and she felt herself losing her cool. Before she knew it, she spat out everything she felt.

"Why are you suddenly following me around and acting all protective like you own me? You don't own me!" She paced the floor, back and forth, and her thoughts were jumbled and hazy with rage. But her mouth kept working, even when she knew it shouldn't. "And then you come in her and touch me like- like something you've had before! Why are you doing this? JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Her cheeks were flushed with fury and her breath came out in haggard puffs of air, but she had to admit, she felt so good to let it out. _Renewed even…_ And even as Kakashi stood and closed the gap between them until he was mere inches away, she did not back down. _No, _she kept her rigid posture and darkened eyes pointed straight ahead, never wavering. Even when his hands reached up and softly grasped her shoulders, she did not falter. Until, of course, his hands slipped gracefully down her arms, caressing them gently with his calloused hands. Instantly, the flash of lightning coursed in her veins again, but this time the warmth returned with a vengeance, and the delicious sensation throbbed painfully in her belly. She shuddered under his touch, biting her lip to keep her mind from losing any sense she had left. And then, before she lost herself completely in his touch, a flash of reality awakened her, and she shoved him away from her—_hard._ He stumbled backwards and his knees clashed with the edge of the bed, but his years as a shinobi had taught him how to keep his footing, and he poised stiffly, stopping his fall.

"What are you doing? That's exactly what I'm talking about! I never said you could! I never- I never-" And before she could stop herself, she fell to her knees and broke into a fitful of sobs.

The tears streamed down her face freely, like a faucet turned on at full speed, and she fought to control her breathing. But her sobbing was uncontrollable, and her lungs burned from the lack of oxygen. She tried to stop herself, and she knew she should be embarrassed by her explosive display of emotion, but the pent up frustration about the baby, about Kakashi, _about everything_ was too much to handle, and she succumbed to it.

She felt a hand embrace her shoulder softly, but it was so far away to her. Her air supply choked away as she tried to make sense of everything, _anything at all_. And then she felt the desperate need to know everything. She was so tired of feeling so lost.

Peering up at Kakashi through dark, wet lashes, Sakura swallowed, and hitched her breath in her throat, attempting to calm the erratic sobs. After a few moments, her breathing slowed, but her heart continued to race erratically—a loud, clambering sound in her ribcage.

She sent him the most pleading look she could ever muster. "Kakashi-sensei… _please… _stop lying to me. What's going here…? Has… something happened between us?"

Instantly, regret seized Sakura's aching heart as she watched Kakashi's face harden and slip away from her completely. He removed his hand from her shoulder, as if the touch scalded him, and turned away from her. His posture snapped into place—rigid—just like her hardening heart.

"Nothing has happened, Sakura… You're just feeling emotional because of the pregnancy." His voice was muffled from their distance, but the words had never been more clear to her.

Sakura's jaw clenched as a burst of volatile emotion exploded inside her. The tears that had been falling freely, were suddenly forgotten—remnants of a sadness that seemed so far away. _No… there was no more room for sadness—only disdain._

Sakura stood, her feet planted surely on the floor beneath her. Every stretch of skin—_every trace of her being—_radiated with the heat of rage. She couldn't stand looking at him anymore; even with his back turned on her and his silver hair hidden in the shadows of the room, she felt her palms itching, _screaming, _to get him out of her presence. He was lying; there was no denying that, but how did that make her feel? _Betrayed? Sad? Empty? _She didn't want to think about it anymore; not with him so close.

She opened her mouth to speak, but he silenced her with a cold, dark voice.

"Get rid of it, Sakura…"

She froze. "….what?"

He turned, suddenly, and the movement was so brisk she felt herself flinch. His eyes were as cold as his words. "I said, get rid of the baby before it's born."

Something in his voice was so shocking, _so startling,_ that Sakura faltered, losing her sure footing. She stared at him with widened eyes, daring not breathe. "…what?"

He stepped closer. "You heard me. It's not safe for you or for-"

"Get out-"

"But Sakura-"

"I SAID GET OUT!" Colors exploded behind her eyes, leaving a halo of black spots, but the clarity of her vision only seemed to sharpen. She narrowed her eyes, and a low rumble reverberated in her throat.

Everything about Sakura was threatening, but Kakashi didn't back down. He stared at her with equal defiance, his eyes sharp like steel. Sakura waited for him to give in, say something—anything, but as time slipped between them she felt her dangerous exterior wither away slowly. And then the ache came—the dull, choking ache of her heart breaking.

"You're a monster, Kakashi. I used to look up to you. I used to really believe in you. But now, I can't see anything. You're just a hollow shell of a man who doesn't know the first thing about love."

Kakashi's face crumpled instantly as his rigid exterior shattered, and he could no longer hide his emotion. Something akin to horror settled in the creases around his widened eyes, and suddenly the man Sakura was looking at no longer seemed boyish, but rather aged by the pain and suffering in life. He looked crushed, _destroyed even_, and Sakura immediately regretted her words. But it was too late. _The damage was already done._

He should've said something then—_anything to bite back at her words of hatred_. But he didn't. He merely bent his head and stalked towards the window—his movements ghostly and hollow. Sakura didn't turn to watch him leave; just listened—waiting; waiting for the sound of the window to creak; waiting for his silent footsteps to signify his departure. When they never came, she turned slowly, hesitantly; she wasn't prepared for what she saw.

There, in the pale light of the moon, Kakashi stood watching her, his eyes shining with sadness. He tried to smile at her, to show her _I forgive you,_ but the gesture was broken and fragmented. Furrowing his brow, he let his head droop down.

"My whole life I've never been able to show others how I care. But I've tried… and I've always been there. I hoped that one day it would be enough. But it never was… _It never was_."

And then he was gone—a shadowy figure escaping into the dark of the night. Long after he left, Sakura remained frozen, staring at the darkness of the window. She stared and stared until her eyes felt raw and all she could see was the night sky peppered with stars. She tried to think. Tried to feel…

But all she felt was the echoing, hollow ache of loneliness.

Her body began moving without her consent. It reached over and pulled the blanket into her lap. And then she was crawling, the blanket trailing behind her. She stopped at the edge of the window sill where the view of the night sky was the most open, and collapsed into a ball of blankets and flesh.

And as she stared at the moon, gleaming high in the night sky, she saw what she was looking for—the color silver. Silver—the embodiment of empty achiness… Silver—the color of his eyes and hair.

And then she cried and cried until she fell asleep in a blanket of silver light.

* * *

><p>Morning came too soon for Sakura, and when she awoke, she expected to feel her heart wind up and release all the emotions of the night before like a bolt of lightning. But nothing came. No tears. No sadness. Nothing.<p>

She gathered her things mechanically, and even stopped to eat a thorough breakfast—oatmeal with yogurt and berries, but her movements seemed empty—not hurried, not lax. Meaningless. She tried to think about her agenda of the day and things she had to do next, but she found her body was moving without warning, merely following a sub-conscious list of duties. Before she knew it, she was out in the streets of Konoha, shuffling among the crowd.

Her shoulders bumped with the people next to her, jarring her sideways and out of step, but her legs kept moving, unmoved by the disruption. Time passed methodically, and the sequence of events seemed to repeat itself. Step right. Step left. Pretty soon her feet had carried her all the way to the Hokage tower. The large, industrial building loomed in front of her, but for the life of her, Sakura couldn't tell you how she got there.

Tightening the hold on her backpack, Sakura clenched her jaw and tried to regain her consciousness. She reached into the hollow hole in her head and tried to withdraw her sanity. When she finally pulled it out, a little bit of apprehension came with it. _Today her mission started. Today she could finally move on and begin anew… Today she would make her decision…_

Sakura made a movement to step forward, but a flash of color in her peripheral vision stopped her. She turned curiously, wondering what had distracted her. At her feet was a small, dark-haired boy holding a brown, fuzzy teddy bear. He clutched it tightly to his chest and sent Sakura a shy, innocent smile. The resemblance to Asuma struck her, and instantly she knew who he was.

"Sakura…"

Kurenai appeared suddenly by her side, sending her a knowing smile. She ruffled the dark hair of the little boy, and Sakura not only saw, but felt, the love in Kurenai's eyes as she stared down at him. "This is my son, Asuma-chan."

Despite her hollow mood, Sakura couldn't help but smile. He really was a mini Asuma, and even at four years old, she could see the mischievous glint in his eye. _Kurenai must be proud, _she thought, _he's growing to be just like his dad._

"He's adorable, Kurenai-san. You're doing a really great job." She chuckled honestly. "He's going to be a fine shinobi someday."

"Yes, just like his father, I hope."

Kurenai smiled sincerely, but there was something hidden in her sultry eyes. Sakura couldn't help thinking that it resembled something her mother used to give her—a look that showed wisdom untold.

"How are you Kurenai-san? Busy with motherhood?" Sakura felt a little awkward by the conversation. While Kurenai was the former sensei of her friends Hinata, Kiba, and Shino, she never really got the chance to know her on a close basis. She admired the woman from afar, but never felt anything beyond acquaintance. It was odd to her that Kurenai would confront her first.

"Yes, of course. Asuma-chan always keeps me busy, but my days are always filled with love." She chuckled lightly, but then shifted the weight on her foot, gaining a more serious posture. "But actually, Sakura. I've been wanting to talk to you. Do you have a moment?"

Sakura's brows raised slightly in surprise, but she quickly bowed her head in respect. "Of, course. I was going to see Hokage-sama, but I have a few minutes to spare."

Kurenai's smile was warm and open. "Great." She motioned towards the park behind them. "We can chat while Asuma-chan plays."

Kurenai led them down a path towards the small park behind the Hokage tower. It was a quaint, little park with an old swing set and several sand boxes. At the moment, it seemed barren and unused, but in the summertime it was really quite beautiful. Endless patches of wildflowers grew along the paths, attracting colorful butterflies and chirping birds. She had seen Sai there many times with his art supplies, practicing. She'd always thought of it as a place to come with a lover to pass the time. Unfortunately she had never reached that point in her life. It seemed her life liked to occur out of order in that department. _She tried not to think about that, though…_

There were a few children gathered in the middle, gathering whatever leftover snow they could to make a snowman. Asuma quickly ran over, finding his place among the others. He looked so happy and carefree, and Sakura wondered if it was even possible for her to feel that way again. _The cycle of life, _she thought, and then instinctively flattened her palm over her belly.

Kurenai, it seemed, didn't miss the action. "It's amazing isn't it? Incredibly hard to comprehend, but so right in the end."

Sakura wrinkled her brow. "I'm sorry…?"

Kurenai smirked, but there was nothing pretentious about it. Instead, it was filled with understanding. "Being a mother. I wanted to tell you congratulations, and that I know exactly how you feel in a way."

Sakura was deemed speechless. "Oh… thank you, Kurenai-san."

Kurenai's words were so simple, yet, somehow, they were exactly what she needed. Slowly, she felt her heart filling up again, taking the empty space away.

Kurenai was solemnly quiet for a moment, and as the wind picked up, her scarf fluttered with it—the only movement in her wake. Sakura watched her apprehensively from the corner of her eye, wondering how to fill the silence. Luckily, Kurenai was already ahead of her, and she turned to regard her with soft eyes.

"Sakura… I've heard what everyone is talking about. I know it can be hard to face the world when you don't even know how to handle it. But remember, this isn't about the world, or even about you. This is about a child who has no one to protect it but you."

Sakura sucked in a breath. The immensity of Kurenai's words were so strong, yet so delicate—the essence of wisdom. She wasn't sure how she had done it so easily, but, somehow, Kurenai had made sense of everything thing that was too difficult to face for Sakura. Instantly the hollow ache was gone, and she was filled with a shaky, yet brilliant resolve.

She couldn't contain her smile. "T-thank you… so much for that."

Kurenai nodded. "I know that my situation is different, but I _do_ know what you are going through, Sakura. I lost Asuma before he could even be a father. I felt like life was mocking me. Laughing in my face." She paused, chewing her lip in thought. "It was like I was getting a twisted taste of what hoped for, but it would never be what I really wanted. I missed him so much, and I didn't think I could do it without him, but I also knew I had to shape up. After all, I had an example to set for an innocent life. I didn't want him or her to be affected by my hatred or sadness. And then when he was born—_I knew. _I just knew that it wasn't about all that I had lost, but about what I had _gained._"

Tears were welling in Sakura's eyes. She knew it_. _But she couldn't stop. But they weren't tears of sadness or regret. They were tears of understanding—tears that said _thank you for opening my eyes._

Kurenai smiled, letting her eyes drift to the brilliant blue sky above. "I know that you don't know who the father is, Sakura. I've even heard that you have no memory of it either. But that doesn't change who you are. It doesn't make you any different than me. At the end of the day, you're a _mother _either way. Don't ever forget that."

She paused, turning her eyes forward again. For a moment, it seemed that she was done with the conversation, but after a few, silent seconds, she spoke again. "I am not telling you it's your duty to keep a child because you gave birth to him or her. Giving birth only makes you a woman—a member of the female sex. Being a mother is making the best decision possible and giving every piece of your heart and no less. Do you understand what I am saying?"

"Yes." Sakura said honestly—eagerly. _Because she did._

"You are a very strong woman, Sakura, and I know that you will make an excellent mother. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise."

Tears were falling freely from her eyes, but Sakura couldn't contain the bursting energy in her heart. Without thinking, she launched herself into Kurenai's arms and gave her a tight, grateful squeeze.

"Thank you so, much Kurenai-san." She said, her voice muffled in the sleeve of Kurenai's coat. "You've opened up my eyes and said everything I needed to hear. For that I am grateful."

Kurenai wrapped her arms loosely around the pink-haired girl, and then peeled her away to send her a satisfied smile. "Be safe on your mission. And don't forget to eat well and rest when you need to."

Sakura nodded. "Yes, ma'am. I have to go now. I have a meeting with Hokaga-sama."

Sakura bowed her head and then turned to leave. She couldn't help notice the skip in her step as she mounted the steps of the Hokage tower and pushed her way through the crowd.

Today she had awoke with no purpose, but tonight she would fall asleep with clear resolution.

* * *

><p>Shikamaru inhaled deeply, tasting the crisp, wintry air in his lungs. Usually winter wasn't his favorite season, but at moments like this, he couldn't appreciate it more. Winter, in a way, was a desolate change for the usually bustling village of Konoha. The cold temperatures somehow left the landscape empty and barren. But at the moment, it was exactly what he needed—silence. A chance to think without distraction. All the hours of strategic planning were catching up with him, and his head seemed to pound more and more with every passing minute.<p>

Of course, it didn't help that Kakashi _still _hadn't showed up to pull his weight, either. Shikamaru usually had an unspoken respect for the silver-haired man, but this mission was quickly spoiling that judgment. Why couldn't the guy just get over it and move on? It was so troublesome to get yourself involved in other people's affairs—especially women. Sakura was a big girl. She'd figure things out on her own.

Sighing, Shikamaru stared up at the vivid blue sky, watching wisps of clouds pass by languidly. He imagined himself burrowed inside the cottony texture and slowly slipping by the earth as if he didn't have a care in the world. His imagination, he knew, was farfetched, but at least it gave him a chance to forget about his troubles. He knew it was worth it, even for a few seconds.

Unfortunately, his imagination was quickly whisked away as a hurried Neji stalked towards him, looking breathless and haggard. He stopped a few feet in front of Shikamaru, and snapped his posture into a straight line.

Shikamaru sighed again._ How troublesome…_

"Shikamaru… I bring news from the Hokage."

Shikamaru finally met eyes with Neji. They shared a fleeting look of understanding, and then, as if his tranquility completely was forgotten, Shikamaru sat up straight and beckoned Neji to continue.

Neji never liked to beat around the bush, so he dove in headfirst. "A reliable source has informed us that an Uchiha has been spotted in Wind country."

Shikamaru's eyebrows shot up. _"Uchiha Sasuke?"_

"No…" Neji creased his brow, and then paused. The silence between them was eerie and foreboding. "Not Uchiha Sasuke… Uchiha Setsuna..."

Shikamaru shook his head. "I don't understand… Uchiha Setsuna is dead. Besides Sasuke, all the Uchiha's are dead. Are you sure the source was reliable?"

Neji sent Shikamaru an unappreciative glance, but he quickly rebuked it. "Yes, the message comes from the Kazekage himself."

Shikamaru frowned. "Well, I guess that means we have some work to do."

Somehow, he knew that this was a presage for something much bigger. Uchiha Sasuke, it seemed, had some tricks up his sleeve…

* * *

><p>AN: Ugh, I had a little trouble getting through this chapter. I'm a little frustrated with myself because I feel like things are moving so slowly, but I promise it will pick up soon. Thanks to everyone who reviewed! I especially appreciate those who leave me a comment every time I upload a new chapter. Your words are truly inspiring!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: I just wanted to shed light on all the emotions going around in this fic. I know it seems otherwise, but this fic is not angst. I'm sorry it's been all about the emotions, but I just wanted to introduce the depth of all the relationships Sakura's experiencing. Though, I do love writing emotional roller coasters (can you tell? =D) I promise it will pick up. As for Kakashi's behavior? Don't worry, its meant to be frustrating and confusing for now. Everything will eventually make sense… Your reviews have seriously got me in overdrive and I'm kicking these puppies out! Keep them coming! =P

* * *

><p><em>So I will head out alone, hope for the best<em>

_We can keep our heads down as we skip the goodbyes_

_And you can tell the world what you want them to hear_

_I've got nothing left to lose, my dear_

* * *

><p>The moment Sakura walked into the Hokage's office she was immediately assaulted with an uneasiness that warned of stormy conditions. Although Tsunade was perched carefully in her desk and scribbling furiously on an open scroll (a sight that was all too common for her), there was something jerky and repressed in her movements—as if it was taking everything inside of her to keep her cool. This, Sakura knew, was bad. <em>Very bad…<em> The Hokage was a colorful woman when it came to her emotions, and there was no filter to how she was feeling. If she was angry you were more than aware. Because of this, the sight of Tsunade looking grave and seriously apathetic made Sakura feel incredibly nervous. It meant something terrible had happened. Something even Tsunade wasn't able to internalize.

Suddenly, Sakura felt like whatever she had to say was completely miniscule in comparison. Without a word, she slowly began inching backwards towards the door, ready to continue her departure from Konoha and move on from the choking aura in the room.

"Where do you think you're going, Sakura?"

Sakura froze. "I was uh- well, I mean I was going to give you some space since you looked… busy."

Tsunade looked up then, and the fierceness in her honey eyes skewered the small girl in place. "I am not. I have been waiting for you. Come in."

Tsunade's words were a demand, not a request, and Sakura quickly sprung into action. She stepped forward and gave a small bow (albeit deeper than usual), her pink hair falling forward and into her eyes. She did not raise her head until Tsuande spoke again. When Tsunade's mood was serious, she treated her like that elite she was.

A few seconds passed silently, and Sakura's neck began to stiffen from the pose, but she did not waver. Whatever was bothering Tsunade, she wouldn't dare add to it. All it took was one wrong move to ignite the fire.

"Stand up straight, Sakura. A pose like that can't be good for the child."

Sakura snapped her eyes up, searching Tsunade's face for scorn, but to her surprise there was none. Only honesty shone in her eyes. There was a swift flicker of another, fragile emotion, but Tsunade quickly schooled her expression and regarded the pink-haired girl coolly.

"Sakura, your mission starts today. I hope you have prepared yourself well for the long journey…?"

"Yes, my lady. I have packed everything I need. Everything is ready for departure today."

Tsunade lowered the pen in her hand and sent Sakura a discerning glance. "Very well… but you know that's not what I meant."

Sakura blushed shamefully. "Yes, my lady. I apologize…" She paused, twisting the hem of her sleeve in her hand. "I have… made my decision."

Tsunade stared down at the scroll on her desk and chewed her lip idly in concentration. For a moment, Sakura thought she hadn't heard her and opened her mouth to speak, but she quickly clamped it shut as Tsunade stood and splayed both hands across the surface of her desk. After a few moments, Tsunade moved from behind her desk and made her way towards the apprehensive pink-haired girl. She stopped a few inches before Sakura and regarded her with warm eyes.

"Sakura… let me take a look at you." Tsunade reached forward and cradled Sakura's face gingerly, and the action seemed almost affectionately parental. It was then that Sakura noticed that Tsunade wasn't angry or even upset. She was stressed. The anxiety was clear in the cloudy veil over her usually sharp, witty eyes. It was a jaw-dropping sight, indeed. Sakura hadn't seen Tsunade this way since Pain's attack on Konoha.

"I know that I can seem like a hard woman sometimes, Sakura. But I _can _love. And when I do, I love intensely and with all my heart. I hope you know that I have always seen you as a daughter of mine, and I am immensely proud of you."

Sakura swallowed as the sharp prick of tears stung her eyes. "Tsunade-sama…"

Tsunade removed her hands and folded them in front of her. It was a gesture Sakura had seen when Tsunade was trying to hold herself together. The action itself was almost more heart-warming than her previous words. Tsunade had loved her, and didn't want to let her go. It was profoundly endearing to Sakura, and she couldn't help the swell of happiness at the sight.

"Now, Sakura… I have no doubts. I know you have made the right decision even in the judgment of others. I just want you to know that, no matter the outcome, I will be by your side to support you."

Sakura nodded, and a lone tear slipped from her eye, leaving a watery streak on her cheek. She did not pause to wipe it away, though; she forged ahead with courage, knowing that she truly meant the words she was about to say.

"I have decided to keep the baby. It is my honorable duty as a mother to ensure it has a meaningful place in this world." She paused, considering her next words. "And I have also decided not to pursue the father. It is not needed, and will only bring unwanted heartache. However, if the father is revealed somehow, I will decide if he is worthy of my child. However, whatever happened, he didn't want me to know. And to me, that is the mark of a vile being."

Tsunade smiled—a wide, toothy grin that thinned her pale pink lips and revealed a set of gleaming white teeth. Usually, Sakura would feel hesitant by an oddly affectionate gesture like that, but Tsunade, it seemed, was sharing a rare, fulfilling moment with her. She was proud—truly proud, and all the fear and apprehension about the baby disappeared completely. Suddenly, everything seemed to click into place, and she no longer felt dizzy with confusion. She was exactly where she needed to be, and she wouldn't change it for the world.

"Ah, Sakura… you are indeed a strong woman. I truly admire you. I will ensure you and your newborn will fit right back in when you return from your mission. _You're going to make an excellent mother._"

Sakura smiled genuinely, but for some reason there was a dull ache throbbing in her chest. Tsunade's words were like a beacon of light in the darkness, and she truly cherished them, but somehow she knew they weren't coming from the right person. They were words a mother gave a daughter. Words she would always wait silently for. Unfortunately, they would probably never come—not from her true mother anyways. Ever since her father died when she was eight years old, Sakura had struggled to keep a relationship with her mother. But there was too much bickering, too many heated words that drove a wedge between them. And then when Sakura had begged and begged to become a shinobi just like her father, her mother finally gave in, but the distance only grew with time. She had worked very hard, sacrificing her time and youth to become something great—something her mother could be proud of. And she had achieved—more than most in fact. Unfortunately, only silent disagreement remained. And now, here she was, on the road to becoming a mother herself—something she hadn't even told her own mother. She could safely assume her mother had heard the gossip by now, but sadly, she hadn't even thought about her reaction, because she already knew what it would be—disappointment.

Tsunade crinkled her brow, and a look of understanding passed in her eyes briefly. "Oh, yes… I forgot to give you something very important."

Sakura tilted her head curiously as Tsunade disappeared behind her desk. After a few moments of papers shuffling and drawers opening and closing, Tsunade returned to her side, holding a package tied shut with a knot of red string. She presented it to the pink-haired girl, and Sakura cradled it carefully, as if it would break with the slightest shift of movement. Her green eyes stared down at it with awe.

"That is from your mother…"

Sakura gasped and her fingers fumbled. The package would have slipped through her grasp, if it wasn't for her agile shinobi reflexes. Strengthening her hold on the package, Sakura sighed as she traced the edge of the red string—_her favorite color_. She idly wondered if her mother even knew that.

"Oh… thank you."

Tsuande eyed her for a moment, taking in the uncomfortable demeanor and the relinquished gaze. "Sakura, I don't know your mother personally, but I know how rocky your relationship with her has been. However, I do believe as _her daughter_ you owed it to her to tell the truth."

Sakura pursed her lips as the crushing sensation of Tsunade's words settled on her shoulders. She relished in it, however, knowing that she deserved it. She had become an impressive medical kunoichi and had even earned the title of the apprentice for the Hokage herself. However, Sakura was still a human and she had her faults. The relationship with her mother was definitely one of them.

"Yes…" She murmured. "I definitely shouldn't have disregarded that. I guess… well, I just thought it wouldn't matter to her either way."

"Don't be a fool, Sakura. Your mother has her faults I'm sure, but I know she loves you. It's been a difficult journey for you both, but that doesn't mean it has to continue that way. However, I think it would be best if you gave her a little space first. You truly did hurt her by not giving her a chance. I think you should try and write to her while you're away. Tell her about yourself. Tell her about the baby. Tell her anything you want, but just remember you're never going to have a relationship if you never let her _inside._"

Sakura nodded, clutching the package closer to her chest. Squeezing her eyes shut, she imagined it was her mother she was holding instead, telling her _I'm sorry for never being there…_

"Tsunade-sama… thank you. Thank you for everything. You have taught me more than I could ever imagine. I hope I can do the same for my child someday."

Tsunade scoffed lightly, but there was a satisfied smirk on her face. "Oh, please Sakura. I hope you can do better than that."

Sakura chuckled. "I will try."

Tsunade reached forward and ruffled her pink hair, and the gesture caught her off guard. However, she did not show the surprise in her face. Instead, she peered up at her through dark lashes, a slight grin curved into her lips.

"Tsunade-sama…?"

"Hmm..?"

She fingered the red string nervously. "Will I still be… your apprentice when I come back?"

Tsunade tilted her head back and laughed heartily. "Oh, Sakura, I couldn't get rid of you that easily."

Sakura's eyes brightened. "You mean it…?"

Tsunade shook her head, but the smile never left her face. "Of course. Besides, how else will I get to know my new grandchild?"

"Okay, because I was really worried. I mean, I wasn't sure how to make it work. We'd definitely have to find a babysitter and then-"

"Sakura," Tsunade broke in, shoving her thumb in the direction of Shizune's unoccupied desk. "Don't you worry about that. I've got plenty of people who'd volunteer." _Or otherwise be forced to volunteer…_

Sakura could barely contain the beaming smile that stretched across her face. "Of course… thank you."

"You'll have to refrain from saying that so much. It really is a weakness of yours." Tsunade raised a brow at the pink-haired girl, and then turned, stalking towards her desk. "Now, come on, we've got a mission to brief before you leave today."

Tsunade collapsed into her chair and let out a tiring sigh. Reaching down, she pulled out a bottle of sake and two glasses. After a moment of thought, she returned one glass to her desk. "Would like anything to drink…?"

"Water would be fine." Sakura moved closer to the desk and sat quietly in a chair facing adjacent to Tsunade.

Tsunade withdrew a bottle of water and handed it to the pink-haired girl, who mumbled a quiet thank you (again!). Sighing, she poured a large glass of sake and gulped it down like no tomorrow.

"Tsunade-sama…"

Tsunade gasped for air as she finished her sake, slamming the glass on the desk. "Hmm?"

"I'm sorry, but I couldn't help noticing your anxiety when I came in. Is everything alright… Did something happen?"

Tsunade's eyes instantly darkened, but her expression didn't change. "No… it's nothing that concerns you anyways."

"Oh…" For some reason that comment knocked the wind out of Sakura. She pulled her eyebrows together, but said nothing.

"You shouldn't concern yourself with the politics of Konoha, right now. You'll be gone for quite a long time, and things are sure to be changed when you come back."

Sakura nodded stiffly. "Yes, of course."

"Now, the mission is your first priority. Have you read all the details in the scroll I gave you?"

"Yes, I understand it's an M mission."

Tsunade nodded, leaning back into her chair. "Yes, and that's a very important detail too. You're to treat this as a medical mission completely. Under no circumstances are you to show that you are a kunoichi."

Sakura's eyes widened. "I'm sorry…?"

Tsunade leaned forward, placing a finger on her chin. "You heard me. The moment you leave here, you are no longer a kunoichi. You'll have to travel as a civilian and continue the remainder of your mission as a civilian as well. The client specifically stated she wanted nothing to do with shinobi, and any slip up could jeopardize the mission."

Sakura was aghast, and she was sure the color had drained from her face. "But… I don't understand. How am I supposed to-"

"You're to use your medical skills only. It's all you'll need anyways. I spoke with the client personally and for some reason she has a certain… distaste for the job of a ninja. However, she is paying our country well for your medical skills, so her personal opinions are to be taken seriously."

"Oh…" Sakura paused, discerning the new information. "Well, okay then."

"And you'll have to remove that," Tsunade pointed accusingly at her forehead protector, which was currently tied into her hair. "And your clothes will need to be changed too. You'll wear simple kimonos the entire time you're there. If you don't own many, I'll see to it that you are given a new wardrobe before you leave. _Oh, and definitely no weapons._"

The more Tsunade spoke, the more Sakura felt like her entire existence was being ripped away from her. Without her weapons and her trademark hitai-ate, who was she? _A woman, _she guessed—one who happened to be preparing for the birth of her child. The more she thought about it, the more she couldn't argue it. It was probably for the best, anyways. It would be strange if she continued her job as a kunoichi with a growing belly. _Though that could be a tempting advantage in the battlefield…_

"Yes, I understand, my lady." Slowly—hesitantly, she reached up and untied her hitai-ate. Her stubborn bangs instantly fell into her eyes, and she puffed at them angrily. But stubborn they were, and no matter how much she pulled or tucked, the fell right back into her eyes. _Ugh, this will take some getting used to, _she thought.

Tsunade watched the girl's frustration curiously, but said nothing. Leaning forward, she sent the grumbling girl a serious glance.

"Are you ready, Sakura…?"

Sakura stopped attacking her hair for a moment and nodded gravely at her teacher. "Yes, my lady."

"Good… now, there's one more thing I need you to do."

Sakura's face was so serious and attentive that she hadn't even noticed the calculating glint in Tsunade's eyes.

"You're to stop and see Yamanaka Ino before you leave."

* * *

><p>Sakura was irritated. No, <em>scratch that, <em>Sakura was fuming. Of all the people in Konoha, Ino was most likely the last person she wanted to see for a long time (except for maybe a certain silver-haired man). After her ruthless explosion in the village center the day before, Ino had dropped considerably on Sakura's list of favored friends. In fact, she wasn't even planning on confronting her until after her mission. Unfortunately, an order from the Hokage is never to be disregarded, and Sakura found herself grudgingly standing at the door of the Yamanaka Flower Shop.

At first glance, the flower shop seemed closed. The windows, which usually cast a bright, cheery light into the street, were dark and closed off. Peering around the flower displays in the windows, Sakura searched for any sign of life, but found none. _Odd, _she thought, _maybe the Yamanaka's needed a day off._

Luckily, close friendship with Ino through the years had earned Sakura a place in the family and she, consequently, knew the flower shop as well as any Yamanaka. Stooping down, she pulled a small key from the soil of a potted plant near the door. After a few moments of struggling with the lock, she let herself in.

Inside, the room seemed even darker than it did from the outside. Sakura squinted her eyes, trying to make out the shapes around her. When she saw nothing but the shadows of endless amounts flowers, she tried her voice instead.

"Ino! It's me, Sakura. Are you here?"

There was a slight shuffle of movement, and Sakura whirled around, searching the darkened room. "Damn it, Pig! This isn't funny, come out from behind there!"

The light flicked on suddenly, and then there was an explosion of noise.

"CONGRATULATIONS!"

Sakura blinked against the bright light, and even though the voices were all too familiar to her, she struggled to make sense of what was happening. There was suddenly a sea of faces in front of her, all regarding her with excitement in their eyes. A shower of pastel confetti rained around her and in the background she could make out the balloons rising towards the ceiling.

Her eyes were filled with dumbstruck wonder. "O-Oh my… w-what is this about?" She stammered.

Everywhere she looked it seemed more details of the room were popping out at her. The shadows she had thought were flowers were actually varying balloon animals. A table was set up next to them with a large pile of gifts, wrapped cheerily in baby blue and pastel pink paper. In the corner of the room there was a beautiful cherry oak crib wrapped in a huge silver bow. Her eyes welled at the sight of it staring back at her as if it was rightly hers.

"Sakura!" Ino appeared in front of her suddenly and thrust the pink-haired girl into a tight hug that could rival Naruto's. "Isn't this great? We all knew you were leaving today and that you'd be gone for a while, so we wanted to throw you a baby shower before you left! And everyone's here! Well except for Shikamaru because his lazy ass is working on a mission, but that doesn't matter because who cares about him! This about the baby anyways! Oh, god, Sakura, I was a horrific bitch yesterday. I can't even believe I said those things. I, mean, who does that? Really, I-"

"Ino…" Sakura said, interrupting Ino's rambling words that were quickly becoming a train-wreck.

Ino took a deep, shaky breath and it was clear she was trying not to cry. "Sakura, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to say those things yesterday. I think I was jealous, somehow, and a little hurt too. I thought the circumstances were different and that you thought you were too much of a goody to tell me. But now I know the truth, and I feel like shit for it. I totally stuck my foot in my mouth, so I wanted to make it up to you somehow."

Sakura smiled genuinely, and for the second time that day, felt the warmth of tears pooling in her eyes. "Ino… thank you. This is amazing. I'm totally shocked."

"Sakura-chan!" Naruto pushed himself between the two girls and scooped Sakura up and in a spiraling hug that lifted her feet off the ground. "I'm so glad you made it! Did you see all the gifts? They are for the baby!" He kneeled down suddenly and spoke to her belly. "I know you can't see it, little guy, but you've got a lot of great gifts here!"

Sakura tilted her head back in laughter, and the smile on her face was stretched so wide her cheeks stung. Ruffling Naruto's hair playfully, Sakura glanced around the room, taking note of everyone there. Everyone was there alright (minus Shikamaru, Neji, and a certain silver-haired man). How foolish was she to think that her friends would judge her? The happiness inside her was bursting at the seams, and she could barely contain herself. _This was it… this was home._

After a few quick exchanges with friends (including one from Sai who asked if her ugliness would grow as the baby did), the group made their way over to the table with gifts. Sakura felt shy as she sat in the center of the room, tearing paper off of the gifts as respectfully as she could. She was surprised to see that most the gifts were quite touching and rather useful (Hinata had given her a beautiful hand-sewn blanket; TenTen had given her a silver rattle engraved with the Konoha symbol; Ino had given her at least 6 sets of clothing, mostly girl's; Shino, surprisingly, had given her a set of glass baby bottles) but some were just embarrassingly endearing (Naruto, of course, had given her a mini-sized ramen bowl with learner's chopsticks; Kiba had given her plush pillow that looked conspicuously like a dog bed; Lee had given her an awful mini-sized turtleneck outfit that she was sure she'd never put on her child; Sai had given her a set of porcelain plates that actually didn't make any sense at all). That last gift she opened was from Tsunade. It was quite a large gift, and as Sakura tore the paper off she realized why—it was a box of diapers that could surely last her a year. All the gifts had been open then, but it was obvious there was something else waiting for her. Instinctively, she turned towards the crib in the corner of the room.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Ino said, stepping towards the crib and trailing a finger down the smooth, wooden surface. "Tenzou made it for you. He said to tell you congratulations and that he's sorry he couldn't see you off."

Sakura's eyes were wide with wonder as she moved forward gingerly. Slowly, she reached out and mirrored Ino's action as she let her fingers run across the slats of wood. She stopped at the silver bow and slipped her finger inside the knot. Instantly, the color reminded her of Kakashi and the night before, and she removed her hand, as if she were scolded. Thankfully, no one noticed the slip up, and she turned to face her friends, hoping her happiness could push away the images of Kakashi.

"It's amazing. The crib. The gifts. All of it. Thank you all so much. You have no idea how much this means to me."

There were murmurs of _your welcome_, and a few people even came up to hug Sakura, including Hinata and TenTen. Naruto, of course, squeezed the life out of her again, and then skipped off to catch up with Shino and Kiba, who were obviously done with this girly display. Slowly the room began to empty, leaving only three girls—Sakura, Ino, and Hinata. Hinata hovered patiently near Sakura, waiting, it seemed, to tell her something. Sakura, taking note, excused herself from Ino's conversation (about the nursery, of course, and how Sai was going to paint her spare bedroom). She caught up to Hinata in a few, quick strides.

"Hinata…"

Hinata smiled, and there was something apologetic in her eyes. "Sakura-san… I am very happy for you. It seems like you've gotten everything you need for the baby when you return."

Sakura nodded. "Yes, I am so grateful. It helps so much now that I don't have to worry about buying anything when I come back. It still all seems surreal to me, though."

"Sakura-san," Hinata began, her voice unusually resilient. "I heard everything from Naruto-kun, and I just wanted to say I'm very sorry. I shouldn't have judged you that way without knowing the truth."

Sakura smiled sadly, placing a hand on Hinata's shoulder. "You didn't know. I understand. I would've felt the same way. I know how much Naruto means to you. And I know he cares for you too. He'll come around to you eventually. Just give him some time to grow up more."

Hinata nodded in understanding. "Y-yes, he does need some maturing, but I will wait as long as I need to." She paused. "B-But I was wondering Sakura-san, do you plan to… I mean, are you going to search for the father…?"

"No… I've decided not to. Of course, I will always keep my eyes open in case something happens to jump out at me. But, I also know that whoever is low enough to take my memory away isn't worthy of being a father."

Hinata smiled genuinely. "I understand, Sakura-san." She paused, her steel blue eyes swimming with honesty. "T-then I will be your eyes here in Konoha."

Sakura smiled then, and the gesture seeped into her skin and settled in her heart. Life was so unsteady, so untrusting, but there were things that were stable and secure—things that kept you supported even when the floor dropped out beneath you.

Friends, Sakura knew, were one of those things…

* * *

><p>Soon after Sakura left, Tsunade felt her strong, influential façade crumble away like ashes in a long forgotten fire. It had taken everything inside her to face the pink-haired girl. Not because of her upcoming departure or even the talk about becoming a mother. In fact, it had nothing to do with Sakura at all. Tsunade was a powerful woman, indeed, but even people of supremacy experienced moments of breakdown—moments where they question their job, their purpose, and even themselves. This was one of those moments.<p>

Sinking into her chair, Tsunade laid her forehead on the desk and massaged her temples fiercely. She wasn't even sure what to do with herself, let alone Konoha. Uchiha Sasuke had finally hit them where they least expect it, and she couldn't even begin to understand his motive behind it. Why would Uchiha Setsuna, a long dead soul, be walking among the living in Wind country? What was the meaning behind his appearance, and, most importantly, how had he got there? Obviously it had to be some forbidden jutsu that Orochimaru had taught him, but how could she be so sure? Orochimaru was dead (killed by Sasuke himself) and even Kabuto had ended up committing suicide, so whatever knowledge they shared was sure to go to the grave with them. Unless, of course, Orochimaru had taught Sasuke _all _of his secrets, but that didn't particularly sound like something the snake sannin would do. She _knew _that man; almost as much as she knew Jiraiya. Sasuke was a pawn in his plan; he wasn't worthy enough to reveal everything to. However, that pawn had backfired on him ten-fold. Obviously, Sasuke had grown in epic proportions and Tsunade felt her gut wrenching at the thought. She couldn't—_no, wouldn't _allow his hatred to reach Konoha. She would protect her people at all costs. If only she could make sense of his motives and understand what he planned to do next…

Almost on cue with her thoughts, there was a knock on the door that rapped three times, and then the Sasuke Assassination Team followed. Their heads were hung low, but there was a fierce determination in their eyes. Tsunade noticed, however, that a certain silver-haired man was absent.

"Ah, yes… just who I needed to talk to." Tsunade traced her tired eyes over to Shikamaru. "I hope you have come up with a good plan, Captain Nara."

Shikamaru nodded curtly. "Yes, Hokage-sama. We have thought over every alternative completely, and we have devised our plan. However…" He paused, pulling his eyebrows into a frown. "We were not able to confirm it with another member of our team yet…"

Tsunade sighed contemptly, pinching the bridge of her nose as pictures of a stubborn silver-haired man filtered into her mind. "Yes… Hatake Kakashi. He seems to be missing from the group."

Instantly, Genma narrowed his eyes and stepped forward, his face flushed with anger. He opened his mouth to speak, but Tenzou silenced him with a hand on his shoulder.

"Yes, my lady. He wasn't able to make it, but we can assure that he will be informed with whatever we discuss here."

Genma thrust his shoulder out of Tenzou's grasp. "Why are you defending him? He has copped out of this mission completely! While we've been running on no sleep, he's been off in the land of Haruno Sakura!"

"ENOUGH!" Tsunade bellowed, slamming her fists onto the desk. Muttering obscenities under her breath, she turned towards Shikamaru. "Is this true Captain Nara…?"

Shikamaru's face was a picture of hesitance, but after a few moments, he sighed, opening his mouth to speak. "Well, my lady-"

The sound of a door slamming open interrupted Shikamaru, and all pairs of eyes turned towards the interference. Kakashi stood firmly in the door way, and his body seemed to shudder with pants for air, as if he had run all the way to the Hokage tower. Without a word, he stalked towards the desk, not even acknowledging his teammates as he passed them, and slammed his palm onto the wooden surface.

"Tsunade-sama, I need to speak with you, _now."_

The muscle in Tsunade's jaw jumped as she glared darkly at the hand on her desk. _No one, _not even those she called friends, _spoke to the Hokage that way._ The group of jounin standing in the room seemed to notice this blatant display of disrespect, and without thinking, took a careful step backwards. Well, everyone, that is, except Genma. He stared dumbfounded for a few seconds, and then lunged forward, grasping the back of Kakashi's vest and flinging him backwards.

"_You bastard! What the hell is your problem? We've been working in overdrive without you!"_

Kakashi pushed Genma off of him roughly, and his voice was admonishing. "Don't touch me, Shiranui."

"_Why can't you just face the loss of another student? The lives of everyone in Konoha are at stake, and all you seemed to care about is one, stupid girl!"_

"SILENCE!" Tsunade's voice was a screeching, demolishing sound, and instantly both bickering men froze, turning their attention to her. "YOU WILL NOT ARGUE THAT WAY IN MY PRESENCE!"

Genma's face showed a touch of embarrassment. "T-Tsunade-sama, I am sorry. Forgive my rude manners…"

All eyes instinctively turned towards Kakashi—waiting, but he said nothing. Taking the hint, Genma glared one last time at the silver-haired man and returned to his position behind Tenzou. Tsunade's entire being seemed to tremble with fury, but no one spoke; no one even dared to move. After a few moments of silence, she sunk into her chair and folded her hands carefully in front of her.

"Please leave… I need a moment to speak to Kakashi alone."

"But, my lady-"

"I SAID LEAVE!"

No one argued with that tone, and after a few sighs of reluctance, the men slowly departed, the door clicking soundlessly behind them. The silence that followed was defeaning, but neither Tsunade nor Kakashi seemed perturbed by it; both were wholly consumed by the rage they fought to contain. Tsunade, however, was not known for her patience, and she quickly gave in to its wrath, narrowing her eyes darkly at the silver-haired man in front of her.

"I hope whatever you have to say is worth the respect you just lost from me."

Kakashi jaw clenched, but his eyes did not show his anger. "I apologize Hokage-sama. I shouldn't have disrespected you that way."

"No, you shouldn't have!" Tsunade yelled. "I have always respected you Hatake Kakashi, but your actions lately are quickly changing my opinion. I hope you can fully explain why you've been disregarding your mission completely. And I better not hear anything about Sakura…"

Kakashi narrowed his eyes, finally letting the exasperation show in his features. "You promised you would send an escort on her mission…"

"HOW DARE YOU?" Tsunade jumped from her chair, picking up the nearest object (which happened to be the bottle of sake) and hurling it at the silver-haired man. With lightning reflexes, he quickly side-stepped it, and the bottle collided with the wall behind him, shattering into an explosion of glass.

"You will not question my duties as the Hokage of this village!"

"I do not question your duties as Hokage. I question your duties as a mentor."

Tsunade's nostrils flared in fury, and she stepped away from her desk, making her way towards the silver-haired man. Kakashi's eyes followed her as she approached, but he didn't move, _didn't even dare to flinch._ She paused a few inches in front of him, studying his face with narrowed eyes. A few seconds passed painfully, and for a moment, it seemed she was finished as she made a move to step back, but with a swiftness that was so fierce—_so impressive_, she drew her hand back and slapped him hard across the cheek.

Instantly, a huge red welt formed on the flesh beneath his eye, but Kakashi did not wince. He kept his eyes straight ahead and his posture straight—waiting. It was not his place to speak first.

"_You bastard… _You have no idea how hard it was for me to watch her leave today. Every part of me wants to keep her here where she'll be safe, but I know I can't do that. I can't put this village at stake for my personal motives. _That child is not an accident._ It has been created for a reason—one that I haven't been able to figure out yet. And I had to sit here and listen to her tell me that it was her purpose—her duty to find a place for it in this life. But I couldn't tell her the truth. I couldn't tell her how scared I am not knowing what revolting plan she is part of. So, I told her the only thing I know—_I told her I was proud and that I'd find a place for her and her newborn child._ But in all reality, I wanted to tell her that that child isn't a gift—it's a curse. That, I know, makes me a terrible mentor. But my decision to send her away does not. I'm trying to protect her, and it seems no matter what I do, someone suffers. So, tell me Hatake Kakashi, what is it that you think I should've done instead?"

Kakashi turned slowly—purposely, but he did not meet her eyes. "You have made the right decision, Hokage-sama. I apologize for my insolence."

Tsunade scoffed. "I don't appreciate your lies, Hatake."

Kakashi was silent for a moment, his brow furrowing in concentration. After a few, stifling seconds, he locked eyes with Tsunade—onyx on honey. "I understand your grievance with this, but I can't, however, understand how keeping Sakura away is the answer."

Tsunade sighed, rubbing her face with a shaky hand. "You obviously haven't done any research. I, on the other hand, have thought about this more than you know. I've referred back to the history books and I have found at least four instances of this happening. All four were the exactly the same—a woman finds out she's pregnant and is in shock, claiming to have no memory. Most of the time, people get over the shock of it quickly, and just accept it as a chance occurrence—even a gift from God himself. But after the child is born, it quickly becomes clear that it's not a gift at all. In three of those cases the child was created to mix the blood between clans—a sick, twisted form of breeding. In the last case, the child was created to become a jinchūriki. That child was Fū from Takigakure—the jinchūriki for the Seven-Tails."

Kakashi gasped. "A… jinchūriki? But don't they usually choose a member of the Kage family?"

"Yes, that's correct. Most of the jinchūriki are blood-related to the Kage to ensure its loyalty to the village, but Takigakure is not a part of the Five Great Shinobi Countries, so there is no Kage, and choosing a jinchūriki proved difficult. No one showed enough loyalty to the village to present themselves or their child to be a host for the Tailed Beast, so Fū was created instead."

Kakashi's jaw fell open as his mind reeled, attempting to process the newfound information. After a moment, he furrowed his brow and sent Tsunade a questioning look. "I don't understand… why would someone choose Sakura—a kunoichi from Konoha, to carry a jinchūriki? We already contain the Nine Tails in Naruto."

Tsunade sighed. "That I can't understand, either. Most likely politics. Someone may have it out for us, and they plan to use it as a tool against us. But this all can't be assumed, either. Just because Fū was created to become a jinchūriki, doesn't mean Sakura's child was too. _However, we can't completely rule it out, either._ That's why distancing Sakura from Konoha is best."

Kakashi's eyes slid shut. "It doesn't seem right… something about it doesn't line up. Konoha is in good graces with most all the villages that contain a Tailed Beast."

Tsunade turned away, lowering her voice to barely a whisper. "_I know… _I have a gut feeling that's not it at all. Somehow, though, I know that there's something terribly ominous about that child. _I just can't put my finger on it, though._"

Kakashi nodded, but said nothing. Tsunade wanted to believe that Sakura was safe, but her instincts were in overdrive, warning her of something sinister. But what could it possibly be? She had thought about every alternative until she felt like her brain would implode, and nothing even remotely possible came to mind. Who, or what, could possibly want to use a child as a tool, and most of all, why? And why Sakura? Sakura—the talented, caring (though extremely hot-headed) medical kunoichi from Konoha. Somehow Tsunade knew it wasn't chance—Sakura had been chosen by someone who knew her and her strong will. Someone who knew her well enough to know that she'd keep a child she had no knowledge of conceiving.

A sharp knot of uneasiness twisted in her stomach, but Tsunade quickly pushed it away. However dire Sakura's situation was, it didn't take precedence over the fresh news about Uchiha Setsuna. First and foremost, she had to protect the people of Konoha, and focusing on the situation with Setsuna was the only way she could do that at the moment. Without a word, she turned away from Kakashi and made her way towards her desk. Sinking deep into her chair, she sighed, continuing her original task of massaging her temples fiercely.

"Where are finished here, Kakashi… send the rest of your teammates in."

"So, that's it then? Even with all this knowledge you're just going to send her away and wait it out...?"

Tsunade narrowed her eyes. "I said we are finished here. I will no longer to speak to you about this matter, and you will not bring it up again either. _Bring your teammates in now, before I put you on probation for insubordination."_

Kakashi's jaw clenched, but he said nothing. After a moment of heated silence, he turned on his heel and stalked away towards the door. As the door slammed open, Tsunade caught sight of the group of jounin standing near the doorway and looking sheepishly innocent, as if they hadn't even _tried _to eavesdrop. Her wisdow and age, however, told her otherwise…

"You boys can drop the act now. I know you've been standing by the doorway and listening to every word spoken here."

"Oh no, my lady-"

"I said drop it. Now stop standing around and wasting my time. We need to discuss your plans for this mission. Uchiha Setsuna is not going to wait around for us in Wind Country forever."

Kakashi turned abruptly, his eyes wide with shock. "Uchiha… Setsuna? But-"

"Damn it, Kakashi. If you had been paying attention to your mission like you were supposed to, you would've known that already. Uchiha Setsuna has been spotted in Wind Country, and the source has been confirmed by the Kazekage himself. Your teammates have so graciously devised a plan without you, however, so you will not say a word on this matter. You will follow orders from Captain Nara, and there will be no negations. _That is final."_

Kakashi nodded stonily. "Yes, Hokage-sama."

"Now, Captain Nara—would you care to make the proposal?"

Shikamaru stepped forward, his eyes clear and determined. "Yes, Hokage-sama. We have decided to move into Wind Country undercover, and, with the help of the Kazekage, we will track down Uchiha Setsuna and take him as a hostage. Any information about Uchiha Sasuke is detrimental, and he is sure to have it. This will, ultimately, lead us to the target himself, in which we will then devise an assassination plan."

Tsunade lowered her head, listening intently. After a moment of silence, she tilted her head back carefully and regarded the men with sharp, intuitive eyes.

"_Excellent._ Prepare for your mission, men. You depart for Wind Country this evening at 7 o'clock. You're all dismissed."

The men all nodded in unison and then, after a quick bow of respect, shuffled out of the room one by one. As the door shut soundlessly behind them, Tsunade sunk deeper into her chair and let her eyelids slid shut.

Somehow, she knew that this was the beginning of something much bigger, something not even she could prepare herself for.

* * *

><p>AN: Wow, this was a tough one to get through, because I wanted to make sure the information made sense. But this story has only begun. There is so much more to come! Next chapter Sakura departs for her mission and Kakashi finally catches up with his mission as well. I've had so much fun writing this, and I hope you all are enjoying it as much as I am.


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